The Wee Man (18)


Dir: Ray Burdis

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With: Martin Compston, Stephen McCole

Dir: 105 minutes

EVEN by the sometimes subterranean standards of homegrown cinema, this biopic of convicted criminal Paul Ferris, one-time bad boy of this manor, is a shocker. The way this film tells it, Ferris had it so hard from bullies growing up he couldn't help but grow up to be a tearaway.

Really? Even then, according to The Wee Man, he was something of a Robin McHood. While such an approach can be put down to bad judgment, there is simply no excuse for a cliche-ridden script that is more God-awful than Godfather, and a level of acting (with the exception of Martin Compston as Ferris) that is so cringeworthy it makes Garnock Way look like a Tony-award winning production of Ibsen. Criminal.

V/H/S (18)


Dirs: Various

With: Calvin Reeder, Frank Stack

Runtime: 116 minutes

DESPITE running out of originality years ago, the found footage horror, as pioneered by Blair Witch, shows no sign of slinking off into the woods never to return. In VHS, a group of knuckle-headed twentysomethings obsessed with filming their every move are hired to break into a house to steal a very important VHS tape.

Once in, they discover a cache of recordings that expose terrifying goings on. Purposely shot to look like amateur video, the entire shebang looks like some X-rated version of You've Been Framed, but with a notable absence of chuckling babies and accident-prone kittens. Difficult to watch because of the style in which it is shot, and hard to stomach due to the extreme violence. A video nasty indeed.

Monsters Inc 3D (U)


Dir: Pete Docter

Voices: Billy Crystal, John Goodman

Runtime: 88 minutes

THE Pixar favourite from 2001 is given a re-release in 3D in advance of the July release of a prequel, Monsters University, which traces the beginning of Sulley and Mike's friendship.

All the inventiveness, humour and heart with which the animation studio made its name are present and correct here, as we find out if that monster under the bed or lurking in the cupboard really is as scary as we think.

John Goodman voices big blue Sulley, while Billy Crystal issues wisecracks to the dozen as the little green guy, Mike Wazowski, with Mary Gibbs as Boo, the girl who enters Monstropolis and turns the world of monsters on its hairy ear. A joy.