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Dreading the day we're all has-beens

THE polar ice caps are melting, the temperature is rising, we have been relentlessly rained on since spring – tumultuous, skin bruising rain – and yet it's not enough for some people.

Not enough to prompt a bit of recycling, to switch the TV off stand-by, to think twice about taking the car. We are, essentially, doomed. But it's not enough. Here, then, is some terrifying news that will maybe urge environmental slouches to action: we are doomed... and there won't be any coffee.

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