From what age is it acceptable to succumb to nostalgia?
I ask because Daughter Number One caught S Club 7's Children in Need comeback last week and started in with the "I remember whens." She is 18.
At my age nostalgia's fine. Sometimes nostalgia's all I have left. [1] But at her age there's no excuse. She should be looking forward.
The thing is, she didn't like S Club 7 as much as she thinks. Oh, she liked them, but Steps were her real favourites. "Remembrance of things past is not necessarily the remembrance of things as they were," as some bloke called Proust once said. [2]
I know that she is misremembering because I was there. I was a witness to her childhood passions. Frankly I've seen Steps: The Video more times than I've watched Dodgeball and Blade Runner. Combined.
As a result, not only can I remember all the moves to the band's dance for Tragedy [3], I can probably recite the recipe for Pasta a la Clara, the dish Claire (my favourite Stepper) cooked in her behind-the-scenes segment, from memory.
I think I threw it out in the great video cull of 2008. So I can't check for certain.
Still, there's a little bit of me that pines for when Daughter Number One was younger, hadn't started dyeing her hair or getting into hip hop.
But that's because I'm of an age when nostalgic is my default position. I'm nostalgic for everything; for Hollywood movies before they became based on toy brands, for the prospect of a new single from The Smiths, for a 30inch waist measurement.
Was I nostalgic at 18? Was I missing Tom Bakerera Doctor Who or Alan Gilzean?
I doubt it. Mostly I remember 18 being a time of low-level misery, applying acne cream and waiting for life to begin.
I was desperate for all the things I hadn't had yet. Being a grown-up, going out into the world, love, romance, a life of some sort, any sort.
I say as much to J the next day. Her sister has just sent her some badges. Of Parsley and Dill the Dog from the Herbs (a 1968 kids' TV programme, your honour).
Me, I can't imagine wearing a Basil Brush badge but each to their own. "What are you nostalgic about," J asks?
"I don't know. Late-night walks around Stirling University campus, that holiday in Venice.
I wouldn't swap the kids but if there's anything I'd want back it might be one of those days before we were parents. When we were us. What about you?"
"Oh, I'd love to be six again.
Turns out I'm not even part of my wife's preferred past.
[1] Well both Spurs and Stirling Albion are having poor season and I've heard bad things about the new Wong Kar Wai movie.
[2] Probably in French
[3] Admittedly they are a little simpler than, say, Janelle Monae's for Tightrope
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