It's been a good week for ...
Its shopping centre was once likened to Kabul and won the dubious accolade of the UK's worst eyesore in a poll for Channel 4's Demolition series, beating off stiff competition from a Gateshead car park and the cement works in Rugby.
The new town, which came into being in 1956, may have won awards in the 1970s for its "brave" and "innovative" approach to town planning, but by the turn of the millennium it did not have its troubles to seek.
Winner of two Carbuncle awards for the most dismal place in Scotland, the town was described by judges as "a rabbit warren on stilts", and "soulless and inaccessible, something like eastern Europe before the Berlin Wall came down". And in 2003, The Idler's Book Of Crap Towns named it the second-worst place to live in Britain, beaten by Hull.
So it is happy news that Cumbernauld has fought back to win Beautiful Scotland's Small City category. According to the judges: "Cumbernauld's reputation is rather unfairly based on the old shopping centre but, thanks to the work of Cumbernauld In Bloom and associated organisations working hard, the undoubted beautiful surroundings will come to the fore."
What's it called? Really quite bonny after all.
It's been a bad week for … Cumbernauld
The town is also celebrating after being chosen by Sony Pictures Television to host its new, multi-million pound studio and production base to support the filming of Outlander, a TV production tipped to rival Game Of Thrones. But the fantasy drama's American producers have a strange conception of the local lingo, having issued the cast and crew with a bizarre guide on how to converse with the natives when shooting begins later this month.
While on location and caught short, they are advised to ask: "Whaur's the cludgie?" Among the phrases are "how much is this", which translates as "hou muckle is this?". "I'm sorry" is "a'm sairy".
In all my childhood years in Cumbernauld, I cannot recall ever coming across such vocabulary. The guide was leaked by the show's lead man Sam Heughan, who is from New Galloway. I doubt he understands it either.
Other gems include "sen' furra polis" ("call the police").
Cast and crew should be aware that they may well require the assistance of the constabulary if they try this patter in North Lanarkshire.
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