I'M so slow.
I'm like one of Tolkien's Ents, some of whom slowed down so much they turned into trees.
I can't see me branching into that, though I confess that increasingly I feel like a leaf upon the wind.
I was last to buy a car. Last to own a house. Last to settle down. Last to have a flush-toilet. Now, at the age of 55, I'm last to discover Marmite.
There's a small porkie in that last sentence. I'm sure I tried Marmite in the past and found it peculiar. I don't know what caused me to revisit it. I've changed my diet, eating less meat, apart from one night a week when I splurge out on Chinese ribs accompanied by Dundee salad (chips). Maybe I was looking for vitamin B12, with which Marmite is replete.
Funnily enough, you'd think it was made of meat. It's brown and Bovril-like, and curiously addictive. Maybe that's because it's right salty. It's made from yeast extract, a by-product of brewing bevvy. Marmite paste was invented in the late 19th century by a German scientist called Justus von Liebig, and I'm not making that up.
Famously, citizens either love Marmite or hate it, which the manufacturing company acknowledged by making that the basis of a slogan. They also made a special edition called Ma'amite, to celebrate Brenda's diamond jubilee. The company is based in Englandshire, so what d'you expect?
You might expect research to shown Marmite could help defeat the MRSA superbug. And you wouldn't be disappointed. You might also expect to see it dubbed a "superfood" of value to pregnant mothers, the elderly rejuvenating their sense of taste, and vegetarianists after B12.
Other countries have their versions. Australiashire has Vegemite, Switzerland Cenovis, and the USA Vegex. But, in Britland, Marmite is the mother of all spreads.
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