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In praise of - talking animals.

HOT on the heels, or at least flippers, of a talking whale, comes an elephant speaking Korean.

You may laugh, but how many Korean words do you know? Zactly: nane. Koshik knows only five words – so more than the average Scottish footballer – but they sound pretty authentic.

He doesn't know what they mean (he is an animal and therefore, by definition, thick) but he presents a fair facsimile by bunging his trunk into his gob and squeezing the words oot past it. Koshik is speaking out of sheer desperation, as he's lonely. The words he has learned mean "hello", "sit doon", "naw", "lie doon", and "guid" or "good", if you will.

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