I DON'T know where you stand on the Royal Family.
I suppose they're an affront to democracy and all that rot but, really, who cares? The voters are an affront to democracy.
The RF are symbolic of privilege, which isn't good, and of duty, which is, so you pays your taxes and you takes your choice. Unfortunately, The Firm is made up of identifiable individuals, and I'm happier generalising about whole countries and even, given the chance, entire continents.
On the continent of Asiashire, a counterfeit Queen has been attracting huge crowds as she sallies forth in a broad-brimmed bonnet, waving and generally acting the goat.
Crowds in Shanghai, thinking she was the real deal, waved Union Flags (you know, the politically-charged standard you can't avoid in shockingly ignorant or wilfully offensive Scottish supermarkets) and took loads of photies, as oriental people do. See what I mean about generalising?
The counterfeit Queen under advisement was one Elizabeth Richard, an actress who does resemble Her Maj, though she got far too matey on a walk-about and spoiled the magic by loudly breaking wind. Only joking. But, all the same, you've got to ask yourself what the world is coming to when even an imitation British royal can get the citizenry whooping and fawning.
It turned out to be a tourist agency stunt, trying to sell Britainshire to the Far East. Somebody to do with the business said: "Chinese tourists are enchanted by the enriched culture and heritage in Britain." I see. How peculiar.
My own view is that one queen is probably enough, and in Scotland it should be Margo MacDonald. But, until the People's Margo is elected to that position, we'll have to make do with the current pretender.
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