SOME of you, I know, have televisions on the premises, as these have proven to be a diverting entertainment with which to pass every single evening of our lives.
Like everything else in life, televisions have become more complex. More decisions are called for. More choice is available. It's all terrifically irritating.
Thank goodness, then, for the remote control. I used to think these absurd but, fortunately, I am wrong about most things. To me, it was the height of laziness to press a button instead of getting up to switch over or off. But now so much pressing is needed that you'd lose a stone in weight a night if you'd to get up every time you had to change something.
Not being a leading investment banker, I have had to economise and so got rid of Sky+, which records things and can pause live television. The loss was devastating to me at first, but I'm almost over it. I watch mainly DVDs now and, every night, I get down on my knees and thank Buddah for the rewind button on my remote.
Alone in Scotland, or even Britainshire it seems, I have trouble with modern American accents, particularly when the speaker is mumbling a la mode. The real problem, though, lies with flatscreen TVs, which have poorer audio than old-fashioned sets. It's called progress. You wouldn't understand. Thank goodness, then, for the rewind button, which enables me to listen to a difficult bit of dialogue eight times before, eventually, giving up. But at least I made the effort. I like watching TV in the dark, so finding the button on the remote can be difficult. In future, the screen will react to our vocal commands. However, I expect these will have to be given in an inaudible American accent.
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