A STUDENT returned from his university for the summer tells us how caring the uni authorities were in trying to help students cope with the stresses and strains of university life.
A large whiteboard was put up at the entrance on which was written: "Tell us what class you are struggling with and why?"
Below it someone had written: "The bourgeoisie, because they control the means of production."
WORKPLACE eating continued. Frances Woodward in Mirfield, Yorkshire, recalls: "I had a temporary job with a company that supplied foodstuffs. If a pallet got damaged, it got written off and the stuff on it distributed amongst us. One day, the manager asked if any cans of lemonade were left. Apparently not.'That's a shame,' he said.
"A resounding crash heard in the warehouse was followed by a cry of 'There is now', as a pallet accidentally fell off the forklift."
HOLIDAY time, and a number of people are buying their summer clothes. A Glasgow reader heard a girl in the changing rooms struggling into skintight jeans tell her pal: "I think they're too tight," then added: "If I was being chased I widnae be able to run. I could wind up deid."
"Aye, but at least you'd look good," consoled her friend.
So many lives...
TORY MP David Mundell's latest epistle to constituents states: "Like so many of you, I had a 'once-in-a-lifetime' experience when I joined the thousands of you lining the Olympic torch route as we watched it leave the Burns Statue in Dumfries. The torch then passed through Annan before I was able to see it complete its Scottish visit in Gretna. Earlier in the month I was lucky enough to see the torch arrive in Stranraer and now I've been able watch its safe exit from Scotland."
A constituent asks us: "Just how many once-in-a-lifetime experiences can you have?"
Stop and think
OUR tales from buses reminds a St Andrews reader of hearing a girl on a local bus say to the person she was chatting to on her mobile phone: "Oh no, I've just missed my stop."
She then added: "I wonder if the driver will turn round and go back."
"Needless to say she was disappointed," says our reader.
Have a butcher's at this
"I'M on the waiting list for a new kidney," the chap excitedly announced to his pals in a Glasgow pub.
"That's some exclusive butcher's you use," replied his impassive mate.
TROUBLE at the Tour de France at the weekend where saboteurs left nails on the road, leading to over a dozen riders suffering falls and punctures.
A punning sports fan phones to tell us: "The winner that day, Luis Leon Sanchez, will wear a Rangers jersey instead of the yellow jersey in recognition of his tacks avoidance."
We moderate all comments on HeraldScotland on either a pre-moderated or post-moderated basis. If you're a relatively new user then your comments will be reviewed before publication and if we know you well then your comments will be subject to moderation only if other users or the moderators believe you've broken the rules, which are available here.
Moderation is undertaken full-time 9am-6pm on weekdays, and on a part-time basis outwith those hours. Please be patient if your posts are not approved instantly.