IT'S the 10th anniversary of the start of the Iraq war today.
A Scot who was out there tells us of the difference he noticed between American and British troops. "A US Marines armoured column which went past had its vehicles nicknamed 'Lifetaker', 'Soul Stealer' and so on. A bunch of Black Watch squaddies watching them were a bit bemused. Their Warrior fighting vehicle had 'Big Hamish' stencilled on the side."
DINING continued. Mike Ritchie was in a hotel, which is now closed, funnily enough in Angus, where an American diner complained to the waiter that his steak was tough and the vegetables undercooked.
"Nothing like speaking your mind is there, sir?" said the waitress, before walking away.
DIFFICULT questions children ask: a reader was in Glasgow's Sauchiehall Street when a father was passing a takeaway shop specialising in chicken dishes with his young son who asked: "Why do they have to kill chickens?"
Perhaps his dad was fed up answering too many questions as he merely replied: "Because chickens are man's natural enemy," and kept on walking.
IT'S the Budget today and one worried reader tells us: "When the Chancellor was quoted as saying he was '110% focused on the economy' all he did was clear up any lingering delusions we might have regarding his ability with numbers."
NORMALLY people speaking loudly on their mobile phones on trains can be very annoying to fellow travellers. But Tom Rafferty, who caught the very early train to London from Glasgow the other day, could only feel sympathy for the chap near him, as the train passed Preston around nine o'clock, who bellowed down his phone: "Cancelled? How do you mean, cancelled? I'm on the 0630 for this!"
ANDY Cameron resurrecting a joke about St Mirren winning the League Cup provokes David Martin: "Andy isn't the only one who can dust off a classic.
"A punter in a Paisley bar sees an old friend celebrating who tells him, 'I've won the lottery and bought St Mirren!'
"'Brilliant news, are you going to get me a pint so I can join in the celebration?'
"'I would if I could, but I only got three numbers'."
AND Gavin Aitchison wondered if the Paisley team had some heavenly help in securing the cup. He tells us: "The subtitles on BBC News 24 managed to turn 'St Mirren fans lined the streets of Paisley' into 'St Mary and fans lined the streets of Paisley'. No wonder Hearts lost."
Amazing what women can fit in their handbags.
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