MORE turmoil at Rangers as former manager Walter Smith resigns as chairman only days after the club's league cup defeat.
As Aberdeen fan Gary Chisholm put it: "So Walter Smith does do walking away. Personally I think he stayed Forfar too long."
Over the top
ACTUALLY our favourite Walter story was the one told when he was club manager, and accused of being too defensive-minded in their run to the Uefa Cup final in 2008. It was claimed that Walter was having his roof repaired for £4000, and the builder, because he had to replace tiles, told him: "I'll need two up front and the other two when the job's finished."
"Two up front!" screamed Walter. "Are you mad?"
Booze culture
THE other Glaswegian in the news yesterday was actor Peter Capaldi, named as the next Dr Who. An English reader phones to tell us: "The first episode will be filmed in his native Glasgow. He'll be seen fighting hordes of Cidermen."
Identity crisis
AND another reader muses: "So I guess if he triumphs he'll be known as a British Dr Who, but if the Daleks beat him, he'll be a Scottish Dr Who."
It's all Greek?
SCOTTISH journalist Marjory McGinn has written a book about living in a remote part of Greece's southern Peloponnese entitled, don't groan now, Things Can Only Get Feta. She realised how remote it was when she tried to explain where Scotland was to a villager by saying it was on top of England.
"Where's England?" the chap replied.
Wool pact
THEY do things differently in the Highlands. The Translocation Festival at Helmsdale, just south of Wick, is commemorating the 200th anniversary of the Kildonan Clearances, when people were cleared off the land for sheep, with the play Who's Afraid of the Big Bad Wolf. The wardrobe mistress said she was struggling to make a costume for the actor to be disguised as a sheep - so a local crofter simply sheared a real one, and left a huge sack of fleece in reception for her to work with.
Year-long complaint
DAFT gag in a Glasgow pub last night? "I got sacked from my job printing calendars," said the chap at the bar.
"And that was after all the extra days I put in."
Post poser
A READER told of the lamp-post conundrum in Glasgow's Maryhill where new litter baskets have been added to the posts that are being replaced. Now West End reader Donald Macaskill says: "The saga continues. A lamp-post painting programme around Byers Road appears to have been completed, leaving some posts fully painted, some partially painted and some with not a single lick of paint. The puzzle is, how was it decided which to paint and which to omit?"
Safe option
"I'M happy to be a passenger when the wife drives the car," declared the old buffer at an Ayrshire golf club at the weekend. "I even wave to her from the bus stop."
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