I dreamed a dream

Diary Editor

Friday 9 November 2012

PEOPLE are still talking about that great night at Parkhead this week.

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Ken Smith

As Victor Brierley put it: "Had a really weird football dream. Hearts about to die, Hibs at the top of the league, Rangers in the Third Division and Celtic beat Barcelona."

Hankies at the ready

PERHAPS not as gushing as some, Glasgow comedian Frankie Boyle saw the pictures of crooner Rod Stewart in his seat-for-life at Parkhead wiping away tears at the end of the Celtic match, and commented: "I know the feeling Rod. My coupon was busted as well."What's so funny?PETE Beckley, named Reading Comedy Festival's New Act of 2012, worked in IT until he signed up for a comedy course in Edinburgh which he hoped would help him with his presentational skills. Says Pete: "On the second lesson the comedy tutor asked us all to get up and speak for five minutes. I was afraid the other people there might laugh at me but the tutor assured me they wouldn't."All in the nameREADER Bernard Gray was driving behind a tanker operated by the Hamilton firm of Grant Henderson when he idly wondered what cargo it was carrying. Then he noticed on the side of the tanker, the company's website – www.wemovesh.it – and wondered why a Hamilton company would have an Italian website.Bid for escapeBBC Scotland's Reeval Alderson was at a conference at Glasgow's Barlinnie Prison this week discussing reoffending. He says: "Intriguingly, apart from the keynote speakers scheduled, there were four breakout sessions. Prison staff looked on nervously as these were under way."Hair-raising ideaSO what has the strangely coiffured Donald Trump been up to during the American elections? Jason Ballinger tells us: "Trump, who took to social media to agitate against the re-election of Barack Obama in his usual tactful manner, was brought back to earth by one comment on Facebook. It simply read: 'We shall overcomb.'" Feathers flyIS there a Herald Diary book coming out for Christmas, asks an anxious reader. There is! It's called The Herald Diary by Ken Smith, published by Black and White, and includes the tale of the chap in the Partick supermarket being stopped by a security guard and asked why his backpack was lined with tinfoil – a common ruse to immobilise security tags. "Someone has stolen my roast chicken!" the suspected thief replied. From LA to FifeOUR Hollywood/Scottish crossovers, reminds Andy Ewan of the sultry actress Michelle Fifer and her neighbours Gary Cupar and Julie St Andrews.High-flyerWE asked about rugby tours and Matt Vallance tells us about a Scotland tour to Canada in the 1980s when a then uncapped Scottish player, now a legend, was followed to every game by the same Canadian girl after meeting him in Vancouver. "Nothing unusual in that," says Matt, "except she turned up in daddy's private jet."

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I dreamed a dream

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