ONE of the many successes of the Games has been the entertainment zone at Glasgow Green, though the need to have bags checked by security does lead to queues.

One family of tourists were queueing the other day when the wee boy in the party told his mother that he could put his head through the metal fence they were standing beside. Immediately the wee Glasgow wummin in front of them turned round and chided him: "Don't you dare. Your mammy disnae need that on a day like this." Suitably chastened, the wee lad behaved himself.

Capital offence

GREAT to see so many visitors in the city. An English couple at the Games were taking a taxi back to their hotel when the driver asked them: "So what do you think of Glasgow?" As their only other visit to Scotland had been to the Edinburgh Festival, when the streets were also full of happy tourists, they told him, 'It's just like Edinburgh'."

"Better not say that too loudly," he cautioned them.

Waved off

THE athletics are finally under starter's orders at Hampden, but booing was heard in the stadium on the first night. Had the crowds turned ugly towards an English competitor? No, it was simply that the crowd was doing a Mexican wave and they were booing a small section where the folk weren't taking part.

They soon got the message and the wave continued on its journey to much cheering.

Wealthy minds

GLASGOW businesses have been warned not to use the Commonwealth Games in their advertising unless they have paid a fee, so some have become a bit creative. The great Pot Still pub in the city centre had a board outside yesterday which declared: "Common in. There is a wealth of whisky and beer." The words "Common" and "wealth" are in capitals twice the size of the rest of the chalked message.

Coffee up

SO what have the sports journalists been up to during the Games? A Clyde-sider, the title for the volunteers at the Games, was on duty at the dignitaries' lounge at Ibrox for the rugby sevens when a journalist tried to slip in to get a free cup of coffee. When the Clydesider gently told him he did not have the right accreditation, the journalist said he was only getting the coffee for venerable rugby commentator Bill McLaren.

Fortunately the Clydesider was a rugby fan and knew that Bill was no longer with us - so coffee denied.

Pitch battle

TALKING of the rugby, Garry McNulty tells us: "Waiting in the Subway queue after the rugby at Ibrox, I heard a rugby fan declare: 'Between the opening ceremony at Parkhead and the rugby sevens at Ibrox, how long will it be before we see great entertainment like that again at both these stadiums?'"

Need a hand?

VOLUNTEERS in the city have giant foam hands to help point folk in the right direction. Charlie Neill in Pollokshields swears he heard one official describe them as the "physical representation of a digital directional equipment item".

Status symbol

WE mentioned the BBC captioning the south side park as Bella Houston. Inevitably it encourages readers to remind us of the classic - very old, that is - tale of the woman at Glasgow Queen Street station asking at the ticket office: "Maryhill, single." So the chap behind her put his cash down and said: "Alex Smith. Married."