SAD to hear of the death of Scottish artist John Bellany who was a favourite around the world.

We recall, though, that Baroness Ashton, the EU's foreign policy boss - official title, High Representative of the Union for Foreign Affairs and Security Policy for the European Union - had a Bellany painting removed from her office wall when she moved in because it included a nude.

As a colleague of Lady Ashton memorably put it: "She really didn't like walking into her office to be confronted by a large pair of breasts, however artistic they may be."

Revised lines

TALK of poetry on the Edinburgh tram route leads to Richard Farquhar in Brodick changing a famous mock-William McGonagall couplet to:

"As I was walkin doon the road,

"Ah saw a bus, a tram by goad."

Any more?

Web humour

MORE from dads who think they are funny. A Glasgow student tells us he staggered downstairs late in the morning after a fancy dress party the night before -he had gone as Spider-Man.

"What time did you crawl home at?" his dad asked.

Dry humour

MARILYN Garrett tells us that the family's copy of The Herald earlier this week had water spilled over it and her husband had the bright idea of pegging the soaking pages on the whirlygig in the garden to dry. Their daughter rather cleverly told him that that wasn't what was meant by online news.

Pot luck

BIG sports news yesterday was Celtic's draw for the league stages of the European Championships. All the teams were seeded in four pots, and as a Celtic fan delightedly explained to a Rangers supporting colleague : "Yyou see we have four pots all containing the very best teams in Europe. Your pots these days only contain mince 'n' tatties."

Topical retort

A READER swears to us that he heard a guy in the street being approached by a homeless chap with a pile of magazines in his hand who asked: "Big Issue today sir?" and the chap merely replied "Syria" before walking on.

Trial run

"I'M going potholing at the weekend," said the chap in the Ayrshire golf club the other day. "Or as we used to call it, going out for a run in the car."

Raw deal

INTERNET dating continued. A Glasgow woman was telling her pals that the latest chap she met for a meal was perhaps not too sophisticated. When she told him before ordering that she liked her meat rare, he replied: "What? Like lions or tigers?"

Lonesome pine

AFTER our story about a Santa being on display in Denny's Railway Inn, Christine Pacione in Milton of Campsie says there is a conifer with Christmas decorations 400 yards up the Campsies. "People had presumably decorated it last Christmas to bring a smile to weary climbers. What I can't understand is the decorations have remained attached to the tree for eight months in such inhospitable conditions," says Christine.