WE asked for your removal stories, and Allan Mackintosh recounts: "When we moved from Glasgow to Troon, my wife approached one of the removal lads at the new house to ask if they could remove a very large spider from one of the bedrooms.
'Sorry hen, we don't do livestock' was his dead-pan reply."
DOG names continued. Brett Clough at the Cardwell Bar in Gourock recalls a barmaid who called her black lab Deefer. When a bemused Brett asked why, she replied: "D fer dog, obviously."
FORMER Scotland footballer John Robertson's autobiography Super Tramp has just been published in paperback by Mainstream. In it, John recalls being at the Excelsior Hotel with a Scotland squad under the stern managership of the late, great Jock Stein. John had repeatedly asked the comely receptionist what time she finished her shift, and eventually she gave in and said she would be in room 402.
Writes John: "I went to the room and knocked but there was no answer. I went to my room and asked the night porter to ring 402 and to my horror he said: 'You want to speak to Mr Stein as this time of night?'"
Just for kicks?
CABINET reshuffle yesterday of course, and Labour's Jim Murphy, the Eastwood MP, was loving the intrigue. As he put it: "Only one Tory MP at 5-a-side football this morning, the rest at home in the belief that staring at their phone would make it ring."
But perhaps the most colourful reaction was from writer Paul Bassett Davies, not a fan of the Tory Government methinks, who observed: "Expecting us to be excited by this reshuffle is like expecting a corpse to be excited when the gravediggers change shift. "
Sad but true?
STILL with the nicknames, the Rev John Gillies in Dailly, Ayrshire, remembers an organist at another church who referred to his wife as his "melancholy baby". When John asked why he had given her the unusual nickname he replied: "Oh she's got a heid like a melon, and a face like a collie."
Wrong lime of work
OH to be young and on your first job. An East Kilbride reader reveals: "My young niece working for the first time behind a bar in London was asked for a lager and lime. She handed the customer a glass of lager, a lime, and a knife. Needless to say that was her last shift."
FOR ageing music lovers, the death of George Gallacher of much-loved sixties Scottish band The Poets was particularly poignant. Hundreds packed his funeral at Linn Crematorium, and Jim Buchan tells us: "The sombre mood was lifted when his former bandmate and brother-in-law Fraser Watson belted out a few of George's songs on acoustic guitar. At the end of the final song Fraser raced across to rattle out a brief paradiddle on George's coffin.
"Unconventional, but we could visualise wee George looking down from that stairway to heaven with that big wide smile on his face."
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