NOT everyone, it seems, is taking the independence referendum as seriously as the politicians.
As one reader declared yesterday: "Wait a minute. Do we really want Scotland to have its own entry in the Eurovision Song Contest?"
Any other independence oddities?
Sign of the times?
THE lawyer's slip-up when asking the elderly couple signing wills ("Who would like to go first?") reminds Campbeltown solicitor Cambell Read: "I had a young couple in my office to sign a deed. There were two pencilled lines where each should sign. However my secretary, usually fastidious in such matters, had neglected to mark initials on each of the lines.
" When the young chap asked me on which line he should sign I replied, 'The gentleman normally goes on top'
"This caused much amusement betwixt the couple and reddening of my face.
"Not least when the young lady, still smirking, signed the uppermost line and gave me a wink."
OUR tale of the assistant head-teacher who had to cope with an office door bearing the legend "Ass Heads" leads to Calum Carmichael recalling the Edinburgh professor who wrote on his blackboard: "Professor Blackie cannot meet his classes today."
Says Calum: "A student knocked off the c to read 'Professor Blackie cannot meet his lasses today'. Not yet having left the building, the professor knocked off the l: 'Professor Blackie cannot meet his asses today'."
TAM Cowan, who presents the BBC Scotland documentaryWhat Burns Did for Me, being broadcast on Burns Night, was taken with our story of Glasgow dentist Philip Friel asking patients for their favourite dental-themed songs, and suggests:
Plaque Is Black by Floss Bravos
I Am Scaling by Prod Stewart
Drilling Me Softly With His Prong
Rinse You've Been Gone
WHY do we still have phone boxes? To provide a place for late-night revellers to use as a loo, you might suspect if you ever take a sniff inside one these days.
A reader in Sauchiehall Street noticed someone using a phone box, and thought it had been a while since he had seen such activity. A fellow walking past in the opposite direction caught his eye and declared: "Everytime I see someone in a phone box I feel like I'm watching dinosaurs roam the planet."
Prophet and loss
OUR stories of Jehovah's Witnesses remind the Rev Eric Hudson in Bearsden: "When I was minister of Kintore, one of my church elders opened the door to find two representatives of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints standing there. 'Good morning, sir,' one of them said. 'We'd like to speak to you about the Prophet.'
"'Would that be the P-R-O-F-I-T?' he asked. 'No, sir, the other one,' they replied. But they didn't stay long."
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