GOOD to see Glasgow journalist, humorist and songwriter, the late Cliff Hanley, featuring in the latest edition of the Oxford Dictionary of National Biography.
We were once told that it was Cliff, a proud former pupil of Eastbank Academy, who claimed his house was broken into and the police officer laboriously took down the details of what was stolen, pausing when Cliff included "my dux medal". The officer asked with some astonishment: "What did your duck do to get that?"
Take the high road
A READER swears he was in a newsagents in Wales when a fellow customer told his companion: "I think I'll pick up a walking guide to Scotland."
She replied with some concern in her voice: "There's no way I'm going to walk to Scotland."
Friend in need
DAMSEL Sophie, who is bringing her one-woman comedy cabaret Hot to the Edinburgh Fringe this year after a sold-out run at the Adelaide Fringe, tells us that Edinburgh audiences can be a bit restrained in their praise.
After one Edinburgh show an audience member said to her: "Thanks for that. My friend really enjoyed it."
FOOTBALL fans are getting excited about the European Championships kicking off tomorrow. We are reminded of the fan who announced: "I can't stand these people who hate football, but still go along to games to cause trouble and ruin it for everybody else.
"Bloody referees ..."
Big night out
WE don't know whether it is art imitating life or vice versa, but a reader who works in the whisky industry travelled down from the Highlands to Glasgow to see the Ken Loach film The Angels' Share in which some Glasgow troublemakers get involved in the whisky industry.
Half-way through the film he and his girlfriend walked out as some drunks in the audience had brought a carry out and were shouting and swearing through the film.
Says our reader: "The manager apologised. Apparently one of the actors in the movie was in attendance and had invited some of his friends along for a wee night out!"
So not a Cannes Film Festival experience then.
NEWSPAPERS recorded the death the other day of Eugene Polley, who invented the television remote control.
Reader Jim Evans wonders: "Is it true that the prototype failed and he took out the batteries, turned them round and slapped it on the palm of his hand and it worked again?
"That was after he found it down the side of his sofa, mind you."
POTENTIAL jobs were being discussed in a Glasgow pub the other night when one toper opined: "Prison guard sounds a pretty easy job."
When asked for an explanation, he added: "I mean, who would try to steal a prison?"
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