SINGER Rod Stewart has just finished a great run of concerts at Glasgow's new Hydro.

Alan Barlow in Paisley tells us of a previous trip by Rod to Glasgow when he stopped off at one of his favourite pubs, the Wee Barrel, in Paisley, en route to Glasgow Airport.

Says Alan: "Rod bought all the locals a drink. An old punter in the corner failed to recognise the blond troubadour but called over, 'Thanks son. Did you have a wee win on the horses?'"

Poo-pooed

OUR tales of police stations remind a reader of Glasgow detective Joe Jackson's biography in which he told of John McVicar, before becoming head of CID, putting a fake dog poo on the station floor and pouring steaming hot tea on it for realism. The inspector arrived, threw a fit, told John to clear it up and was stunned when John picked up the offending item with his bare hands, before realising it was a joke.

The inspector thought it so funny he asked John to set it up for the divisional commander, who was visiting. John though, went to the kennel and brought back the real McCoy, which he placed on the floor. The commander came in, saw the poo, demanded it be cleaned up, and the smirking inspector bent down to pick it up.

White heat

ALTHOUGH not a police station story, a reader nevertheless is reminded of the miners' strike when picketing miners built a beautiful snowman at their picket line which was destroyed when a police van reversed into it.

The next day the snowman was rebuilt but with a fake police helmet on its head. This appeared to annoy a police driver who then deliberately drove into it. The snag was the miners had rebuilt it over a metal traffic bollard.

You tube?

A GLASGOW reader tells us he was speaking to his parish priest who was recalling his early days in Glasgow when he went on a hospital visit and thought a nurse had helpfully written "Cath" beside the names of patients who were Catholics.

After talking to a couple of them the young priest soon realised that it actually referred to those who had been fitted with catheters.

Changing priorities

IN the nice try department is the young Glasgow father whose wife was changing their new baby's nappy and who suggested that he take a turn. "I'll do the next one," he said from behind his newspaper.

When the time came for another nappy change, his wife looked pointedly at him and he replied: "I meant the next baby."

Sob story?

OUR stories of verbal misunderstandings remind Gordon Casely in Kincardineshire of a version in the Doric: "When I worked on an Aberdeen newspaper, we printed an ad for a "Saab, Insch".

"The irate farmer tore a strip off the advertising department next day, pointing out that what was for sale was actually a saw-bench."

Suites him

A FINAL Slater's Menswear story. Bill Cassidy worked for Walker Air Conditioning in Abbotsinch which had a company golf tournament with the prize of a £150 Slater's voucher. Says Bill: "The winner walked into Slater's and explained he was a member of the winning Walker Cup team. "This prompted Ralph Slater to introduce himself. However, once it was explained to Ralph it was not THE Walker Cup, he was suitably amused and another satisfied customer was gained."