"BEEN thinking of buying a sat nav for a while now," said the chap in the Glasgow pub whom Andy Cumming overheard.
"But if I want to go to any Rangers away games next season I guess I'd better."
In it for the long haul
"MY parents went to Florida in January to avoid the Scottish winter," said the young woman in a Glasgow cocktail bar this week.
"It's July, and they're still not back."
WE mentioned the Edinburgh Fringe programme descriptions of the shows, and a reader points us towards the appearance of veteran left-wing campaigner Tony Benn, pictured, to answer questions from the public on a documentary about himself. Tony, aged 86, writes in the programme: "I got a death threat last week. I haven't had one for ages, so I was chuffed."
TALKING of the Fringe, subversive German comic Christian Schulte-Loh is appearing at the Base Nightclub in Cowgate. His website is germancomedian.com. As he told us: "When I made inquiries, the website with that name was still available. Who would have thought?"
IN the news was the story of the cheap carrier Megabus having one of its buses stopped by armed police on the M6 after a passenger using an electronic cigarette substitute being mistaken for a terrorist. A student tells us: "The scare was caused by an electronic fag? Someone lit an actual fag on my last Megabus journey and no-one batted an eyelid."
And as one observer of the news commented: "Conduct experiments to find the Higgs Boson at Cern and you're a hero. Do it on a Megabus on the M6 and you're a terrorist. Double standards."
"WENT to the cash machine in Aberdeen," Andrew Horne tells us, "and was warned to look over my shoulder for thieves.
"Instead I decided to look at the screen for the real ones."
WE get a phone call from a Londoner who asks: "Fancy losing a few pounds? Try tennis."
He then adds: " A fiver on Andy Murray to win Wimbledon should do the trick."
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