In defence of the stance of the Catholic Church against same-sex marriages, Martin Conroy states that the Church "favours laws which outlaw discrimination against the elderly, the unborn, immigrants, women and gay people" (Letters, September 1).

How can this be so when, for example, women are not present at conclaves or at meetings when important doctrinal decisions are being made, when homosexuals are not permitted to be within the communion of the Church unless they confess to the "sin" of leading a homosexual lifestyle, and when it is widely known that Catholic couples are using birth-control methods other than those defined by the Church?

Many Catholic families live with the quandary of having a loving relationship with a gay son or daughter , which is thrown into sadness and disarray by the immovable stance of the Church which condemns their child as a sinner.

Caroline Campbell is to be congratulated for her courage in this unique fight for equality both within and outwith the Catholic Church, and for saying what many Catholics are thinking.

On quoting Aristotle, Mr Conroy may be aware that he also said : "The only stable state is the one in which all men are equal before the law."

Tina Oakes,

38 William Mackie Crescent,

Stonehaven.

Three years before the late Cardinal Winning's death I wrote him a very angry letter telling him of my disgust at the behaviour of paedophile priests and saying I was seriously considering leaving the Catholic Church. At the end of his reply he said: "Don't leave us – stay with us and try to make us better."

These days we are living in a secular society where many people have little respect for those of us who believe in God. When we get alarmed at the number of abortions or say marriage is a unique lifelong union of a man and a woman we are loudly reminded about the paedophile priests. Like many other believers I am confident that, in spite of many faults, my faith has made me a better person. And I think we have a right to stand up for what we believe.

The Scottish Government states that churches will not be obliged to conduct same-sex marriages. Can Alex Salmond guarantee this? I have already heard two very emotional gay men say on television that they want to get married wherever they wish. It looks like the European courts will be busy with their human rights.

This is a very serious issue and I shall not be surprised if at the next Scottish election there will be candidates standing in favour of marriage to remain as it has always been – between men and women. Cardinal O'Brien is doing the right thing. He is courageously standing up for the right of the Catholic Church to practise the teachings of Jesus Christ.

Bruce McKenzie,

312 Western Gardens,

Edinburgh.

In replying to me, Martin Conroy writes (Letters, September 1) that the Catholic Church supports gay equality. I certainly accept that many Catholics do. In the Scottish Social Attitudes Surveys of 2006 and 2010 more than half of Catholic respondents agreed that same-sex couples should be allowed to marry.

But the leadership of the Catholic Church has been saying something different. For example, speaking to the Scottish Catholic Observer last December, Cardinal O'Brien said that not only is same-sex marriage wrong but civil partnership is too. He also said "same-sex relationships are demonstrably harmful" and "no compassionate society should ever enact legislation to facilitate or promote such relationships".

Similarly, the Church's spokesperson Peter Kearney said on television last month that school pupils should be told that same-sex relationships are harmful, risky and dangerous.

This is an agenda of turning back the clock, removing all legal protection from same-sex couples and their families and, in effect, reintroducing Section 28 to stigmatise young LGBT people, and children of same-sex couples, in our schools. It is certainly not a gay equality agenda.

Tim Hopkins,

Equality Network,

30 Bernard Street,

Edinburgh.