AN Edinburgh crematorium is offering online funerals.
The bad news on the shopping front is that John Lewis has just reported "outstanding Christmas sales".
David Cameron and his Ministry of Bread and Circuses hope to cheer up the populace with the London Olympics and the Queen's Diamond Jubilee.
Patients should be asked about their diet, smoking and drinking habits every time they see a health professional.
The Department of Festive Affairs has warned that midwinter celebrations as we know them in Britain are no longer sustainable.
This is a delayed appreciation of the life of Jimmy Duncan, Govan boy and industrialist.
This topic should be in another of the columns that hang about this bit of the Herald.
The Department of Festive Affairs has issued its annual report on Christmas.
The Scottish Department of Festive Affairs (DFA) has urged revellers to invoke the spirit of Sir Harry Lauder and keep right on to the end of the road.
The topic for today was to be the war of words between Britain and France on the euro front.
The Scottish Premier League has decreed an orderly return to standing at football grounds.
The top-heavy Ministry of Defence is to axe 700 senior posts, including rear admirals, major generals, and air vice-marshals.
I HOPE to celebrate the Queen's diamond jubilee by being out of the country for as much of the year as possible.
THE interminable Christmas TV adverts for perfumes are entertaining in a gruesome kinda way.
I've been awfy worried about the euro.
Life is too short to read the 452-page report by the Financial Services Authority into how the Royal Bank of Scotland was brought to its knees.
I DO not understand the economics of the euro crisis.
HURRICANE Friedhelm would have been a small footnote in meteorological history.
SCIENTISTS have been exploring the deepest part of the world's oceans in greater detail than ever before.
I OFTEN write in praise of Lidl.
THE UK intelligence agency has been using an online code-cracking competition to attract recruits.
Edinburgh's giant pandas have been in the city less than a day but there's trouble already.
THE Speaker of the House of Commons, John Bercow, has spent £37,000 of your money and mine having his portrait done and getting himself a coat of arms.
I WRITE to you today from in front of the oven.
The Northern Lights of old Aberdeen mean sweet FA to me.
Shocking revelations at the Leveson Inquiry yesterday as a former Daily Star reporter claims some tabloid newspapers are not "truth-seeking" but "impact-driven".
It is widely accepted that us Scots don't do enough to celebrate St Andrew's Day.
You will have read that Facebook has shrunk the world so much the degree of separation has been cut dramatically.
SCIENTISTS have compiled a list of planets most likely to sustain life as we know it.
The Coalition plans to reduce workers' rights and make it easier for employers to sack staff has been the subject of frantic calls to our advice helpline: