The Anglican church in Sydney, Australia, plans to change the marriage vows and have the bride pledge to "submit" to her husband.
Reaction has been swift, not least from some who think the submission is to do with behaviour as chronicled in the internet soft porn novel Fifty Shades of Grey and that a pair of fluffy handcuffs will be involved.
The Bishop of south Sydney, Robert Forsyth, says the choice of the word submit is based on the New Testament which talks about the church submitting to Christ. He does not explain why it is women who have to do the obeying.
I believe it is important that women should submit in marriage. They should submit an accurate financial budget each month and stick to it. They should respect the rule that current expenditure cannot come from the capital budget. Liquid cash should only be transferred from the Bank of Husband's Pocket if it is being placed for safety in a high interest account.
The husband must recognise that all purchases involving shoes, hairdressing, beauty treatments, and cosmetics lie entirely within the purlieu of the wife and may never be challenged or even mentioned.
The bride must vow to love, honour, obey, submit, and recognise as legally binding any arrangement involving a match in the European Champions League group stage or beyond. Or any football game involving the Scotland team even if it involves travelling to Paris via Copenhagen and Tallinn.
The couple must pledge to observe a statute of limitations which prevents any reference to transgressions real or imagined committed more than six moths previously.
The wife should promise to haud her wheesht when requested in a reasonable manner so to do. The husband should take a sacred vow to shut his geggie if he knows what's good for him.
Both parties must promise never to covet thy neighbour's ass although we seem to be getting confused here with the Ten Commandments.
The bride should agree that any debate on future issues within the marriage should be conducted within the ambit of argumentation theory using informal logic to examine fallacies and critical questions as they relate to everyday and practical situations.
Both must agree to have and to hold but not by the throat. They should never go to bed angry but stay up and fight.
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