David Cameron's latest idea to cut public spending is to take housing benefit away from people under the age of 25.
This will not only save £2bn a year but will declare war on the feckless workshy. Which, as you know, is essential for the rebuilding of the British economy. The 380,000 under-25-year-old housing benefit claimants will be expected to go back and live with their parents. Or parent singular, since they will be equally workshy and of the feckless tendency. If a return to the nest is not possible these under-25s may require to go and live with granny and/or grandpa. In the absence of such an option grannies should be provided by the Government.
On pain of losing winter fuel payments and other old-age benefits, grannies and grandpas should be made to accept indigent under-25 lodgers into their homes. It's like taking in refugees during the Second World War but the children are a bit older.
With this large number of elderly people no longer living alone, the Government will be able to slash the care budget. Many old folk who are a bit wandered may have the pleasant illusion they are actually living with their grandchildren. The young lodgers will have the opportunity of contributing to society by bonding with the older generation. Some may just decide to steal their pensions and cash from the tea caddy.
The grab-a-grandparent initiative may not be sufficient to cope with all the 380,000 young people made homeless. We will have to build more bus shelters, preferably the old-fashioned type that weren't just advertising hoardings and provided shelter from wind and rain.
It is also time that British banks had more of those indoor cash machine facilities where under-25s can find cosy accommodation of an evening. Jobcentre plus offices might double as night shelters. Being fit and healthy, the under-25 feckless ones should be able to live rough. Mr Cameron's Government might help by providing sleeping bags and tents. But we don't want the homeless too visible. Maybe there should be camps where they can be concentrated. With simple wooden huts where the workshy can be accommodated and given useful empoyment. All privatised, of course.
* A hint for families who don't want to take back their homeless children. Take the Cameron option and abandon them down the pub.
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