There is a hotline if you know of any green ground in Glasgow that should have flats built on it.

A kids’ playground. A sports area that used to be maintained by the council.

Make that call. The council will grant permission. Concrete and glass will sprout.

One proviso: the ground has to be where folk seek a des res. Don’t call about waste land in deprived areas.

I think there must be such a hotline. The council isn’t efficient enough to identify the land on its own.

A typical application: Mr McGregor retires with no pension. He sells his vegetable patch to a developer. Warrens for Peter Rabbit and pals are replaced by warrens for humans. It’s a nightmare for Peter and those who live near the vegetable garden.

Here is a real planning story about the boys who live down the lane.

Otago Lane, a sleepy community on the banks of the River Kelvin, has a mews building with maybe six residents.

It has a clock repair workshop whose owner could be in a Beatrix Potter book. A shop with hundreds of thousands of second-hand books.

It has a record store selling vinyl. And a cafe which is a lively meeting place – even though it sells tea, not alcohol.

The plan is to engulf this haven of alternative lifestyle in a development of 163 flats housing 350 people. Plus shops and, most likely, a big pub. There will be no sky to look at. Wildlife will be evicted.

The protest movement is called Leave the Lane Alane.

All the political parties have pledged their support. Which is a worry. Can’t see salaried politicians personning the barricades. The anarchists will if they are organised enough to turn up.

Plan B is to have a resident declared a national monument. Probably Clarke Shearer, who is a singer and gardener. He is really more of an SSSI (site of special scientific interest). He thinks he is an area of outstanding natural beauty.

PS: The people at Glasgow City Council might prefer to keep the ground green. But they have to find cash to freeze council tax and pay wages.

It’s a sair fecht, as Steven Purcell knows. You get no thanks. The day Steven stood down, exhausted, as council leader, his contribution to the city was marked in a pub quiz by a team calling themselves Pass the Purcell.