What a regressive nation of whingeing malcontents Scotland has become. The Austrians will all have had a good laugh at our expense in the last couple of weeks over the rain forest’s worth of mock indignation chronicling Celtic’s controversial (is it safe to say self-inflicted?) exit from the European Cup-winners’ Cup in 1984.

Of all the chores imposed on a modern sports writer, surely the most depressing is the kind of retrospective dross that has clogged up the column inches of the nation’s newspapers like fish batter to an artery 25 years after a perceived miscarriage of justice.

Day after day, players and managers involved in the unsightly tie – of which three instalments were ordered by UEFA – have been wheeled out to condemn the arch villain, conman Rudi Weinhofer, and his gang of vigilantes for costing Celtic a chance of winning the tournament.

Nowhere in the landfill site of cuttings has anybody thought to berate the smart alec whose decision to throw a bottle on to the field at Celtic Park sparked the chaotic scenes in the first place and cost his team the tie, or condemned the rampaging violence that compounded the defeat in the replay at Old Trafford.

Instead, there has been a constant stream of infantile comments from grown men who should know better. Heck, there has even been outrage among some ex-players revelling in their 15 minutes of fame that Rapid had threatened to show a red rag to a bull by wearing – wait for it – their evil red away jerseys.

Tony Mowbray, of all people, has even been dragged into this feeble debate. The normally cerebral manager presumably took leave of his senses when he declared, “I hope they remember that controversy on Thursday” – or maybe Celtic simply have tickets to sell and so are happy to hype this nostalgic clap-trap. Celtic have even placed adverts in the same newspapers with a photo of Peter Grant – a veteran of the tie – under the banner: Rapid Vienna 25 Years On. It does Celtic no favours.

Is this really what we have been reduced to? Are we so bereft of positive aspects to promote that we have to appeal to the lowest common denominator and appeal to the fans’ persecution complex in order to relieve them of their £30?

It also seems to have escaped attention that Celtic’s ‘injustice’ occurred in the Cup-winners’ Cup: the same two-bob trophy Celtic fans rib their Rangers rivals for cherishing compared to their club’s feat in the European Cup five years earlier?

What next? If Celtic win, will Artur Boruc, Stephen McManus and Scott McDonald fall over themselves to dedicate it to Bonner, McStay and Provan? And what if Celtic lose, would Rapid’s players be forgiven for getting their own back by walking out of Celtic Park wearing the same turban-style bandage Weinhofer was fitted with after his phantom head injury?

The build-up will at least ensure an electric atmosphere inside Celtic Park on Thursday. Mercifully, the behaviour of supporters has moved on from the carnage of Old Trafford, even if some people’s minds have not.

AND ANOTHER THING …

Artur Boruc made a welcome and long overdue return to Celtic’s rota for media chores on Friday. The Sunday newspapermen smacked their chops when the Pole strode in to the interrogation suite at Lennoxtown, and the big man did not disappoint. There is a mythology attached to Boruc that makes him both fascinating and misunderstood.

For all his indiscretions and misdemeanours, Boruc is not nearly as bonkers as he looks. Who else would have the savvy to cultivate his cult status as the Holy Goalie in a city riven by religious intolerance? He playfully joked he has given up the fags as part of his new approach but provided the most succinct explanation of the madness of his job, for which he is paid the highest salary at Celtic. “Being a goalkeeper is a stupid job: where else would you get paid for diving about for two or three hours a day?” Priceless.

AND finally …

Hearts’ financial problems are bad enough, but they have had a lucky escape over a proposed flitting. It is four years since the club were in negotiations with Cala Homes over the sale of Tynecastle, until Vladimir Romanov swept to power and activated a get-out clause. Last week, Cala Homes reported a record pre-tax loss of £266m for the last financial year and their survival has only been secured by a HBOS bail-out. Suddenly the £30m debt owed to Romanov’s own UKIO Bankas seems like a drop in the ocean.

Maybe Celtic simply 
have tickets to sell and so are happy to hype this nostalgic clap-trap