Christmas dinner for dummies

Call me a culinary coward, tell me I'm a unworthy wimp, but for me Christmas Day is more about popping champagne than basting turkeys. For years I've been in the enviable position of wafting in and out of the kitchen, glass in hand, while others do the work. The prospect of greater responsibility is enough to make me want to throw in the festive tea-towel, cast off the tinsel necklace and run to the nearest airport.

I still shudder at the memory of being roped in, year after year, to help with the veg prep for our family Christmas meal for 16 and counting. On Christmas Eve I could be heard cursing under my breath as my hands went numb under the cold tap while I peeled countless potatoes for mash AND roasters. My least favourite task was criss-crossing the stems of hundreds of brussels sprouts before julienning more carrots than I could count. All these went under water overnight while Mum prepared the turkey and stuffing. Then there was the laying of the table to ponder, and the clearing up. But the details of how to deliver the perfect Christmas dinner have remained a mystery to me. Until now.

To say I'm nervous when Paul Tamburrini, chef director of Martin Wishart's The Honours restaurant in Edinburgh, agrees to coach me in the fine art of putting together Christmas lunch would be to underegg the pudding. The debut festive menu at The Honours, which opened in July, has been jointly devised by Tamburrini and Wishart. At £38.50 for three courses, it combines seasonal, Scottish flavours in brasserie-influenced dishes, and includes traditional treats such as pumpkin veloute, free-range turkey with fondant potatoes, stuffing, sprouts, roasted figs with florentines and a rich, sticky Christmas pudding.

Though on paper it looks fairly simple, what worries me is getting the timing right so each element of the meal is ready at the same time. Where to begin?

On the day I arrive, I survey the gleaming kitchen and immediately start to panic. But Tamburrini and his staff are cool, calm and collected. Thus I quickly discover the first secret of seasonal success: do as much in advance as possible. That includes the soup, stuffing, potatoes, sprouts and pudding; and perhaps the figs, although it's best if they can be made in the morning. And, dear reader, the good news is that since you have a further fortnight to prepare, you have ample time to get your own act together.

The soup can be made up to a week in advance and frozen. The hardest bit about this deceptively simple dish is cutting and peeling the pumpkin (though it's good for bingo-wing exercise) and removing the pips, a truly fiddly job. Here's tip number two: slicing the pumpkin before peeling each wedge makes the task much easier. And make sure you have a very sharp knife. The stunning bright orange of the gourd and its subtle nutty, wintry flavours are enhanced by adding parmesan, butter and cream towards the end of cooking. Tamburrini says there is no need to add spices such as cumin because it's good enough as it is. It's a seasonal luxury that is ridiculously easy to make. I'll definitely be making this at home.

Sprouts should be cooked on the day, though they can be trimmed and scored the day before if stored with a damp cloth placed over them.

Tamburrini uses maris piper potatoes because of their floury texture. Cut them into same-size wedges to ensure even cooking (for boiling and roasting). Once peeled and chopped, they can be kept in the fridge overnight if covered with a damp tea-towel (not in a bowl of water).

The stuffing mix can also be made a day or so in advance. Simply roll it like a sausage in tin foil, twist the ends and keep it in the fridge until ready to oven bake.

For the florentines and other sweet recipes pastry chef Zoe McCafferty advises buying a silicon mat. "At around £20 it's quite expensive, but it lasts for ever and can be put in the oven and through the dishwasher. It always stays flat because it's quite heavy," she says. It's OK to use parchment paper instead, though. The florentines are worth making in advance, because they require a bit of focus. I particularly like the delicate lace effect created by sprinkling the blitzed-up toffee, and their crunchy, buttery texture, which contrasts with the soft figs. If you make them in advance, they can be stored in an airtight container and left at room temperature – don't put them in the fridge, as this makes them sticky.

McCafferty serves the figs lukewarm rather than piping hot or freezing cold, so as to release the spicy flavours. Make them the day before and store in the fridge. And you don't have to make the ice-cream if you can't or don't want to, as there are many Scottish dairy farms making their own delicious ones.

So far, so good. However, as luck would have it, the turkey, the stuffing and the veg should really be cooked on the day. That means getting the bird into the oven at least five hours before you want to eat – which theoretically gives you time to get everything else together while it's cooking.

The turkey is the top priority for the Christmas cook. Always, always, choose the best you can afford. Tamburrini pre-ordered his free-range birds from St Brides in Strathaven. Four to four-and-a-half kilos is the optimum size, because it's big enough to feed at least six people with leftovers the next day, and small enough to allow you to control the cooking.

Here at The Honours we look at the beast before us. It's plump and firm to the touch, the fresh dark meat glowing through the plucked skin. The giblets are removed and the cavity cleared. Tamburrini recommends keeping seasoning as simple as possible to allow the natural flavour of the meat to come through. He shows me how to gently lift the skin from the neck side to slip in some unsalted butter and smear it across the breast before resealing the skin, covering it in olive oil and rubbing it with rock salt. The cavity is filled with a half-head of garlic, sliced through the middle; an onion, halved; several stalks of rosemary; and an orange (though this is mainly for the aroma it sends out as it's cooking and its aesthetic appeal than for flavour).

"Never cook the stuffing inside the bird, as it's difficult to ensure it's all cooked properly," he says. The Honours kitchen has a sophisticated steam oven, but at home the turkey can be covered in tinfoil in the roasting tin, which then acts like a steam oven, and cooked at 210C/gas mark 6 for 10-15 minutes, then at 180C/gas mark 4 for four hours (calculated at 30 minutes per pound or 500g). Constant basting is essential. The foil can be removed a hour before the end of cooking to brown and crisp the skin.

Crucially, the cooked bird should be lifted out of the oven and left to relax for a good hour before carving, though it can still be basted at this stage.

By this time I'm hot and flustered from running around trying to find my forgotten notebook. Details and instructions are becoming jumbled in my disorganised head, and I am desperate for a calming G&T. But Tamburrini's relaxed, and it's catching.

Put the potatoes for the fondant in a non-stick roasting tray with duck fat. Heat the tray and saute the potatoes until golden brown. Add enough good-quality chicken stock to cover them and no more, then season with salt and pepper. Put them in the oven and add a good bit of butter: this will give them great flavour. Cook at around 190C/gas mark 5 for 15 minutes, then serve.

For the roast potatoes, just peel and cut them accordingly. You could roast them along with the turkey: coat them with some duck fat, sea salt and black pepper, and roast for 45 minutes, basting and turning them to give an even colour. You might want to add carrots and parsnips, sliced lengthways.

Next, the trimmed sprouts need to be boiled for six minutes, drained, sliced and gently sauteed in butter. Add dijon mustard to taste, and finish with salt and black pepper. Phew. Easy peasy. Oh, and don't forget to heat the figs up gently on the cooker top while the main course is being served.

To carve the turkey, first take off the legs then slice the breast. If members of your family fight over the legs, take off the leg meat and serve it with the breast. Hmm. That's one trick I wouldn't dare try at home. Though, having seen Tamburrini's kitchen miraculously cleared up by his staff, I would try to enlist the help of the younger members of my family to help with the clearing up were I ever to host the Christmas meal – the penalty for not doing so being no pudding.

At this point, Wishart arrives to try our turkey and tucks into a leg, though he says for him the best bits are the two "oysters" underneath the bird – a detail he hasn't yet revealed to his two young daughters, who still prefer the leg meat. He says the traditional Christmas meal has not changed much over the years, and that a bird, a ham, a leg or a joint remains the centrepiece of shared celebration around the world.

"What you should be striving for is simplicity and letting the flavours of the turkey come through," he says. "If you're using a good turkey you don't need to do anything at all, except take the time to cook it. Good ingredients are, as always, the key."

Wishart himself has much to celebrate. This year alone he opened The Honours, gained a Michelin star for his restaurant at Cameron House at Loch Lomond and become the first chef to be awarded an honorary doctorate from the University of Edinburgh in recognition of his culinary contribution to Scotland. "It's been a good year," he says modestly.

I can honestly say I've experienced first hand the sweat and tears involved (on my part, anyway) in putting together a festive feast. So, Christmas cooks everywhere, I salute you all, but I'm glad I won't be doing it again any time soon. Now where's that corkscrew?

RECIPES

PUMPKIN VELOUTE

1.5 large onions, finely diced

3 cloves of garlic, finely diced

1 medium potato, finely diced

150g unsalted butter

1 large grey pumpkin, sliced

500ml chicken stock

200g double cream

100g parmesan

Sweat the onion, garlic and potato in butter. Add the pumpkin, cover and cook for 5-10 minutes then add seasoning. Heat the stock, add it to the pan and cook until soft. Add the cream and parmesan, blitz until smooth then pass through a fine sieve and season to taste.

TURKEY STUFFING

2 onions, finely chopped

2 cloves of garlic, finely chopped

20g unsalted butter

250g artisan sausage meat

125g dried apricots, diced

1 egg, beaten

25g fresh breadcrumbs

Salt and pepper

Sweat the onions and garlic in the butter until soft with no colour. Add the remaining ingredients and combine well. Lay some tinfoil on a work surface, smear soft butter on the centre of the foil and place the mixture on top. Roll the foil into a tight sausage shape and seal both ends with string. Cook in the oven at 180C/gas mark 4 for 45-50 minutes, or until done.

ROAST FIGS AND FLORENTINE BISCUITS

THE FLORENTINES

110g caster sugar

50g unsalted butter

25g flaked almonds

Melt the sugar in a heavy-based saucepan until it takes on a rich golden colour. Gently add the butter a little at a time, mixing well. Once combined, pour on to a silicon mat or a sheet of greaseproof paper and allow to cool.

When cold, blitz to a fine powder in a food processor.

Using a sieve, sprinkle a 2mm layer of the sugar mixture on to a silicon mat or greaseproof paper and top evenly with the flaked almonds.

Gently cook at 160C/gas mark 3 for about six minutes, and set aside to cool.

THE FIGS

50g butter

30g caster sugar

12 new season figs

75ml water

75ml Amaretto

1 vanilla pod, split and seeds scraped out

Set the oven to 150C/gas mark 2. Melt the butter and heat until it is light brown, then add the sugar and mix until dissolved. Add the water, Amaretto and vanilla seeds and combine well.

Stand the figs in a pan just large enough to accommodate them and gently cook the mixture for 10-15 minutes or until just soft. Serve at room temperature, or just warmed through, with a large florentine biscuit and a good-quality caramel ice-cream.

CHRISTMAS PUDDING

140g suet

140g golden sugar

140g currants

140g raisins

140g sultanas

35g chopped almonds

75g plain flour

75g fresh breadcrumbs

75g mixed good-quality peel, chopped

30ml lemon juice

0.5tsp salt

0.5tsp good-quality marmalade

2 small eggs

90ml Guinness

0.25 cooking apple, grated

Put all the ingredients in a large mixing bowl and combine well to ensure there are no pockets of flour or breadcrumbs.

Divide the mixture between eight buttered moulds (about 250ml) or two one-litre moulds.

Using scissors, cut an oval of greaseproof paper and an oval of tinfoil for each mould. Place the tinfoil oval on top of the greaseproof paper oval and make a pleat in the centre, forming a circle.

Place these over the pudding moulds and tie them firmly over the top with a piece of string.

Place the moulds in a pan on a trivet or an upturned saucer, add enough boiling water to come about a quarter of the way up the moulds, cover and steam for four hours. If you wish to make the puddings darker, steam them for longer.

Top up the water in the pan if required.

Steam again for about an hour before serving.

Visit www.thehonours.co.uk.