The supper: Local butcher’s haggis if you can, but there’s always the cheap Lidl number. Most folk don’t like to mess with the classic, straightforward haggis, neeps and tatties – but the truly rebellious can always add a bit of coriander to their neeps, or even some spring onions to their mash.

The music: Get out one of your old Celtic Connections CDs to give your evening a global feel. Or put on Eddi Reader Sings The Songs Of Robert Burns.

Do the drill: You may not want to do the full Burns ceremonial ultra-marathon in your home, but just in case here it is: Gather, Selkirk Grace, Parade of the haggis – preferably to pipes, Address To A Haggis, Eating, Singing, Immortal Memory Address, more singing, music and readings, Toast to the lassies, Reply from the lassies, Tam O’Shanter, more singing and speeches, Auld Lang Syne.

Or keep it short and sweet: Just revel in the Address To A Haggis and trench those “gushing entrails bright”, then read out a few other poems. To A Mouse is good for a family gathering. For adults, if you’re feeling your mojo, go full Tam O’Shanter. Singing or playing a musical instrument really badly is also to be encouraged.

Other poets: The real pleasure of Burns Night is in going off piste, finding that bit of Burns you’ve never read before, or even introducing another, dare I say it, living poet. Go on, take a risk. Maybe even write your own.