A man who, beyond the age of 26, finds himself on a bus can count himself as a failure. So said Margaret Thatcher in 1986. She was bound to be right, of course, so that makes me a failure. But I have to confess that, to fail in such a way makes me mighty proud.

You see, I quite enjoy getting the bus in and out to work. Granted, it can be crowded, stuffy and hot/cold/steamy depending on the weather. But every trip along the Maryhill corridor is a mini adventure. And, hey, it's the only peace and quiet I get all day, so I might as well enjoy it.

It seems, however, that I'm in the minority. It turns out that commuting is so stressful that two academics felt driven to conduct a study into the phenomenon. Dr Glenn Williams and Rowena Hill, of Nottingham Trent University, have now unveiled theirresearchdocument.Thesnappilytitled Resilience And Positive Coping As Protection From Commuting-Related Stressors And Strain reveals that workers have up to nine different ways of dealing with the tedium of the daily commute.

The researchers found that the problems include a lack of space, loud music, delays and bad smells. Other issues ranged from smelly foods and terror alerts. The latter tend to be stressful in most environments and it seems a little unfair to blame public transport entirely for the war on terror. But there was no mention of young men swilling Buckfast or setting fire to the back seats. Perhaps these are stresses particular to Greater Glasgow buses.

In case you were thinking that the research carried out by Williams and Hill was a pointless exercise,becomfortedbythe positives that emerged. You see, commuters are really rather resilient souls. Singing, working, reading and forward planning are just a few of the things we turn to. An attractive fellow passenger (nothing like a bit of gawping and a slap on the face to break up the tedium) or a piece of chewing gum (presumably to chew rather than stick on the seats) can help people have a positive journey. Some people even talk to themselves. I'd try some of these tips, but I suspect I might get some funny looks on the 119 if I started to warble and blether to myself.

However, I have my own ways of passing the time. My favourite is the All-Day Ticket Game: guess the shortest journey anyone will take (jumping off at the lights after half a stop is the record).

Another good game is Spot The Old Dear With The New Bus Pass. This involves identifyinggenteel elderly ladies who have never travelled by bus in their lives but feel it would be churlish to turn down free travel. Also fun is counting the number of people who say "thanks, driver" on alighting.

If you don't fancy my methods, here is the experts'list:self-generatedaudiocoping (humming, but not in a smelly way); forward planning (this journey has got to end eventually); cognitive work (how many punctuation mistakes can bus companies make in oneposter?);emotion-focusedcoping (he'sdishy);psychological/medical support (two paracetamol); other generated audio coping (iPod, preferably not someoneelse's);oralgratification (Buckfast);substanceuse(two paracetamolandBuckfast); religious/spiritualapproach (please, God, make this journey end soon). So there you have it:nine ways to make a success of failure.

Maggie, whopresumably now has a bus pass, wouldbe proud.