BIT of a stramash at the end of the Motherwell Rangers game with temperamental Gers player Bilel Mohsni hooking Motherwell's Lee Erwin after the whistle. A Rangers fan explains to us: "Mohsni's contract is up so he'll be leaving Rangers immediately. So if there is an SFA investigation into the scrap we can honestly say, 'A big boy did it and ran away'."
Motherwell players soon returned to the pitch to thank their fans for their support. As Rangers fan Iain Duff put it, and not hurting at all: "Got to feel sorry for Motherwell. All this Mohsni business is spoiling their celebrations at being the second worst team in the SPL."
THE other big event on Sunday was the Britain's Got Talent final which was won by a dog with the help of a three-legged fellow canine, beating a pretty good magician into second place. Stig Abell rather cleverly put it: "As George Orwell once wrote, 'Seven legs good, two legs bad'."
TALKING of Rangers, fan Tom Irvine in Strathaven, does the Word Wheel puzzle in The Herald yesterday where you have to make as many words as you can from the letters on the wheel. The result is Ranger/anger/arrogance/carnage/rage/groan, and he wonders if it was a subtle observation about the game at Motherwell.
TIME flies. It is now a year since the Edinburgh trams finally appeared on the capital's streets. The boss of the tram company Tom Norris was quoted in an Edinburgh newspaper saying, 'It's been a roller coaster'. Crime writer Ian Rankin couldn't resist commenting on social media: "Now THAT I would go on!"
FOOLING young kids continued. A Kilmarnock reader tells us his grandson woke everyone up at six am the other day while screaming out: "Hooray! I'm nine!" His sleepy father shouted out from the adjoining room: "What time is it?" When the little one yelled back that it was six o'clock, his dad replied: "Get back to sleep! You're not nine till seven o'clock!"
PEOPLE can make some very honest explanations after taking strong drink. A reader waiting in the taxi queue at Central Station in Glasgow late on Friday night heard the young woman behind him tell her pal: "Oh my god. I just realised that I'm stuck with me for my whole life."
A YOUNG father was out with his young child at the weekend in a south side shopping centre when he was heard telling an admiring friend: " I know I did a good job dressing my three-year-old when my wife doesn't have to tell everyone she sees that I dressed her. "
OUR mention of pub quizzes reminds Chris Warbrick of hosting one such event at a Callander hotel last year where a question under the history section was "Name the five beaches used in the D Day landings." Says Chris: "It was then pointed out to me that there was a German couple taking part in the quiz. I'm still trying to get rid of the memory that I panicked, and somehow said to them, 'I'm sorry. I thought you guys were doing ok up until that point."
A READER is still puzzling over his son telling him: "If track athletes don't want to be caught taking illegal steroids, why don't they run just a little bit slower?"
A COLLEAGUE wanders over to interrupt us with: "My next door neighbour says he can throw a ball over a hundred yards but his dog can still find it. I don't know, it sounds awfully far fetched to me."
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