With the world trembling under the threat of nuclear war, and with Kennedy launching a top-secret mission to send some of America's brawniest men and glamorous women off into space, seeking out a new colony for any limping, irradiated shreds of humanity which may be left, you'd think there'd be no need to prop up the story with a murder…
Ascension (Sky1) is set on board Orion, a gargantuan spaceship which secretly left America during the terror of the Cuban Missile Crisis. On board are soldiers, doctors and scientists, plus lots of beautiful women in evening gowns and diamonds. They also have swimming pools, ballrooms and bars at their disposal, and are all having a fine old time.
The series opens 50 years after they left Earth, so they still wear the fashions of the American 60s. Think of it as Mad Men in space, if Mad Men was written by shaky scriptwriters, not sure of their subject, because Ascension takes this interesting premise - the cream of the American military venturing into the stars to create a new society - and tacks a murder onto it. The murder of a sexy young woman who was killed whilst bathing nude, of course. So the story of the crusading space ship and the need to form a new world is compressed in this first episode and becomes a standard murder mystery which just happens to be taking place on a space ship.
If that wasn't bad enough, the story whittled itself away further by sometimes taking us back to present-day Earth where a young man is investigating the notion that the US government did indeed launch a secret space mission in the 60s, but everyone laughs at this ridiculous idea, even when he begs us to consider a group of people who wouldn't know about Betty Friedan and The Clash.
So our brave new world has had the life drained from it by a run-of-the-mill murder case and a man on Earth insisting Orion happened but, yes, we already know it did because we're watching it, so where's the dramatic tension there?
This felt like cowardice, as though the programme makers shied away from the mammoth project of creating a new world. Well, if that's the case then leave it to the Hollywood big shots. Otherwise you're just setting up a great idea and then trampling all over it.
Instead of discussing their new civilisation, or how the children born on board would adapt, we saw the military chiefs huddled round tables discussing how a gun (the murder weapon) was smuggled on board their ship.
Watching Ascension is like sitting down to a massive banquet, tucking a napkin into your collar, smacking your chops and thumping your fists on the table, but when the silver lid is lifted from your plate there's nothing on it but a Brussel Sprout. A cold one.
Why are you making commenting on The Herald only available to subscribers?
It should have been a safe space for informed debate, somewhere for readers to discuss issues around the biggest stories of the day, but all too often the below the line comments on most websites have become bogged down by off-topic discussions and abuse.
heraldscotland.com is tackling this problem by allowing only subscribers to comment.
We are doing this to improve the experience for our loyal readers and we believe it will reduce the ability of trolls and troublemakers, who occasionally find their way onto our site, to abuse our journalists and readers. We also hope it will help the comments section fulfil its promise as a part of Scotland's conversation with itself.
We are lucky at The Herald. We are read by an informed, educated readership who can add their knowledge and insights to our stories.
That is invaluable.
We are making the subscriber-only change to support our valued readers, who tell us they don't want the site cluttered up with irrelevant comments, untruths and abuse.
In the past, the journalist’s job was to collect and distribute information to the audience. Technology means that readers can shape a discussion. We look forward to hearing from you on heraldscotland.com
Comments & Moderation
Readers’ comments: You are personally liable for the content of any comments you upload to this website, so please act responsibly. We do not pre-moderate or monitor readers’ comments appearing on our websites, but we do post-moderate in response to complaints we receive or otherwise when a potential problem comes to our attention. You can make a complaint by using the ‘report this post’ link . We may then apply our discretion under the user terms to amend or delete comments.
Post moderation is undertaken full-time 9am-6pm on weekdays, and on a part-time basis outwith those hours.
Read the rules hereComments are closed on this article