THE Greens have big hopes for this Holyrood election, but it's good to know they aren't getting ahead of themselves.

Introducing his party's tax plans this week, lefty brainbox Andy Wightman accidentally said he was speaking for the "Scottish Government" instead of the "Scottish Greens".

He hastily corrected himself as the party's own candidates burst into hysterics at the thought of such an unlikely scenario.

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COLIN Fox, the top candidate for socialist alliance RISE in the Lothians, attempted to persuade his audience of the case for electing socialist MSPs at his campaign launch this week.

"The Scottish Socialist Party MSP between 1999 and 2003 managed to abolish warrant sales, something the Labour Party had been in favour of for 100 years but never seemed to get round to... it took a socialist MSP to get rid of it," he hollered.

Mr Fox chose not to mention the comrade he was referring to by name. Those with long memories will recall that it was Tommy Sheridan, the perjurer who Mr Fox's courtroom testimony helped to send to prison for lying on oath.

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UKIP's bid to persuade voters they are tuned in to Scotland got off to a shaky start yesterday.

As the party unveiled its candidates for May's election, it appeared unsure over whether they were standing for the Scottish Parliament or Tinseltown.

"I am delighted with the strength, breadth and depth of our list for the Hollyrood elections," declared Nigel Farage in a press release.

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MEANWHILE, it was a bad week for UKIP's only elected politician north of the border, the gullible MEP David Coburn.

After he was victim of pranksters during a bid to intrude on the STV leaders' debate through online broadcasting tool Periscope, he fell for one of the more obvious April Fool's jokes yesterday.

"UKIP Scotland projected 7 seats in latest poll" he proudly declared, with the same "poll" also predicting that Ruth Davidson's Tories is on course for a memorable victory on May 5.

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SPARE a thought for the kids. When is a 'jolly' not a 'jolly' - when you have to fly thousands of miles from the other end of the globe to tend to a deepening industrial crisis.

Sajid Javid, the beleaguered Business Secretary, who risks overseeing the death of Britain's steel industry, was asked by an intrepid reporter if he regretted taking his teenage daughter on his trip to Australia. Mr Javid replied: “Not at all.

"Call me old-fashioned but I’m a father who likes to spend as much time as possible with my children and if that means spending time with them, squeezing it in at work or on a business trip, then that’s what I would do.”

Responding to criticism that it made the trip look like a ‘jolly’, the Cabinet minister replied: “Well, I certainly wouldn’t call going to Australia for a couple of days and packing it with meetings a ‘jolly’.”