What does it feel like...to deliver a baby

Years ago I did a degree in psychology and didn’t use it for anything, then had my own children and was really interested in it from going through it myself.

My youngest daughter was very sick when she was a baby, and I saw the medical profession as a really good thing to go into. I didn’t want to do medicine, didn’t want to do nursing but wanted to give something back, so I trained to be a midwife.

The responsibility is huge, so even when everything’s going beautifully you’re always conscious that you might have to intervene if there’s an emergency procedure, so you still have that nerve-wracking feeling until everything’s over – baby’s out, placenta’s out, and everything has settled down. You never really relax, but you have to not show that.

The first time I ever delivered a baby was when I was a student, because you have to deliver 40 babies to qualify. It was very strange and very nerve-wracking because even though you’re supported, you’ve got an awful lot of responsibility. But it was also amazing, even having had children of my own I’d never seen a baby being born, so to actually see it and realise how amazing the whole process is, that was something special.

I’ve also delivered a friend’s baby and that was the best. I just was grinning like a crazy person all the way through – it was amazing! Once the baby was born I was in floods of tears, I could hardly see what I was doing for crying but it was so special. In some ways it was more stressful. The responsibility is vast always, but if it’s someone you know and someone that you love that you’re looking after, you think ‘oh my goodness I really hope nothing goes wrong here!’

I’ve delivered women who have maybe had a baby after years of trying with IVF, and it’s amazing when you put that baby in their arms, especially when it’s so wanted after so many years of trying. That’s quite amazing. That’s very special.

It has to be teamwork between midwives, obstetricians, paediatricians and anesthetists. It’s a really good functioning team – it has to be. It has to be seamless and there’s not a really hierarchy as such in that either – we’re all individual professions and we all work together, but we all have to respect each and know when it’s appropriate to ask for help.

Very sadly we do have situations where the baby doesn’t make it. That’s awful, it’s really traumatic. It's very hard to deal with but to be part of that is also very special, because you’re one of the very few people who ever meets that baby. It’s a privilege to be there for that. You cope with it because you know you have given the very best care to the couple. You don’t really get training to know what to do in these circumstances – you just know what to do.

For me, the very best thing is working with the people I work with. They are an amazing team and we’ve got a really strong bond, and that’s something that you wouldn’t find it many other jobs. It’s a real privilege to be part of a new family being made and that’s definitely the best bit. That and seeing how strong and wonderful women can be. I can’t imagine doing any other job.

Amanda Connelly