Hello and welcome to The Midge, the e-bulletin that takes a bite out of politics in Scotland and elsewhere.
Front pages
In The Herald, Tom Gordon and Daniel Sanderson reports on FM Nicola Sturgeon’s warning to PM Theresa May at the SNP conference.
“SNP won’t take no for an answer” is the Mail’s take on the announcement that a draft referendum bill will be published next week. “SNP fire starting pistol on another Indyref” reports the Record, while the Express headline declares that “Sturgeon does not speak for Scotland”.
The FT says Ms Sturgeon’s warning, and European Council president Donald Tusk’s declaration that the UK faces a hard Brexit or no Brexit, has turned up the heat on Theresa May.
The crazed clown craze hits children’s parties, reports Caroline Wilson in the Evening Times.
The Guardian leads on Michelle Obama’s attack on Donald Trump. See FFS, below.
The Mirror has a picture of Kumbuka, the gorilla who escaped briefly at London Zoo yesterday. See Afore Ye Go.
Camley’s Cartoon
Camley hails the changin’ times as Dylan becomes a Nobel prize winner.
FFS: Five in five seconds
What’s the story? Donald Trump has launched a fightback.
Another one? What does it comprise this time? He claims the election is being “stolen” from him, and the allegations of groping made by several women are "false" and all part of a campaign to stop him becoming president. It’s “a conspiracy against the American people,” he says. In the case of the People magazine journalist who says he attacked her, Mr Trump said: “Take a look. You take a look. Look at her, look at her words, you tell me what you think. I don't think so, I don't think so.”
Yeah, Trump just basically said that People writer Natasha Stoynoff is too ugly for him to sexually assault pic.twitter.com/xggNicNIcb
— Matthew Gertz (@MattGertz) October 13, 2016
Who does he blame? Several groups are in the frame, from the Clinton campaign and the Republican party establishment to the independent body that regulates the televised debates for, he says, giving him a faulty mic in the first debate. Now he has a powerful new adversary.
Michelle Obama on #TrumpTapes: "This is not politics as normal. This is disgraceful" https://t.co/MNRCJIq3Xr https://t.co/8APXNeZNXN
— BBC News (World) (@BBCWorld) October 13, 2016
Who? First Lady Michelle Obama, above, who said the leaked Trump video had “shaken me to my core in a way that I couldn't have predicted.” She told a rally in New Hampshire: “We simply cannot endure this, or expose our children to this any longer - not for another minute, and let alone for four years. Now is the time for all of us to stand up and say enough is enough. This has got to stop right now.” She referred to Mr Trump only as “this candidate”.
Where does Trump go from here? It could be a long weekend if further allegations emerge, and a long night when the final televised debate takes place next Wednesday.
The phony story in the failing @nytimes is a TOTAL FABRICATION. Written by same people as last discredited story on women. WATCH!
— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) October 13, 2016
Afore Ye Go
"He is, more than any other, the poet of our times, as Tennyson was of his, representative and yet wholly individual, humane, angry, funny, and tender by turn; really, wholly himself, one of the greats.”
Professor Seamus Perry, chair of the English Faculty at Oxford University, on Bob Dylan, who has been awarded the Nobel Prize in Literature at the age of 75. AP Photo/File
"I'm a Dylan fan, but this is an ill conceived nostalgia award wrenched from the rancid prostates of senile, gibbering hippies.”
But Scots author Irvine Welsh is unimpressed. Twitter. Ian Gavan/Getty Images
I am ecstatic that Bob Dylan has won the Nobel. A great and good thing in a season of sleaze and sadness.
— Stephen King (@StephenKing) October 13, 2016
But fellow author Stephen King is right behind the Nobel committee.
"It is not a Government priority, I must tell you regretfully.”
Foreign Secretary Boris Johnson on calls to build a new royal yacht Britannia. But if a “consortium of philanthropists” wished to give the queen a yacht and pay for it, he told the Foreign Affairs Committee, he would not “impede” it. PA/PA Wire
“[He is] best known where it counts most, on the front lines of armed conflict and humanitarian suffering”.
UN Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon introduces his successor, Antonio Guterres, above. AP Photo/Seth Wenig
Let me tell you @bbcstrictly, this cape-tossing thing ain't easy.... but I'm going to give it a go ! https://t.co/WQaehrUVmv
— Ed Balls (@edballs) October 13, 2016
This could end in tears for the former shadow chancellor. Tune in on Saturday...
“Happy 41st wedding anniversary to Bill and Hillary Clinton! Yep, they celebrated with a quiet dinner. A really, REALLY quiet dinner. ‘Did you say something?’ ‘No.’ ‘Good’.”
The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon, via newsmax.com. Spencer Platt/Getty Images
Finally, there is much monkeying around on Twitter with the news that a gorilla escaped briefly at London Zoo:
London Zoo said it is "managing an incident" following reports of an escaped gorilla https://t.co/nGDujs22ht pic.twitter.com/z83bsEJPPu
— Zeo Fondue (@newsfondue) October 13, 2016
You've never seen Donald Trump and the London Zoo silverback in the same room. Just saying.
— Julia Hartley-Brewer (@JuliaHB1) October 13, 2016
2016 is basically just an anxiety dream, isn't it? Killer clowns. Trump. Gorillas. None of this is real. https://t.co/Iz1Fta8wsi
— Gaby Hinsliff (@gabyhinsliff) October 13, 2016
Plus a terrible gaffe by BBC Breakfast:
Mistake, or deliberate. You decide! @NicolaSturgeon @BBCBreakfast pic.twitter.com/ntoOiasIQ6
— John Smith (@johnnyTR70) October 14, 2016
Thanks for reading. The Midge is off for the weekend, back Monday. Twitter: @alisonmrowat
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