Hello and welcome to The Midge, the e-bulletin that takes a bite out of politics in Scotland and elsewhere. 

Front pages

The Herald:

Exclusive: In The Herald, health correspondent Helen Puttick reveals what happened when the Scottish Government offered £20,000 incentives to head off a GP staffing crisis.

The National leads on FM Nicola Sturgeon telling ITV’s Robert Peston yesterday that indyref2 was “highly likely” before 2020. 

The Mail says police are looking into claims that Royal Bank of Scotland “asset-stripped” businesses to boost profits. 

The Herald:

The Evening Times marks the start of Challenge Poverty Week with a look at Glasgow - home to one of the worst child poverty records in the UK. 

The Times and the Telegraph say the Chancellor is at odds with Eurosceptic cabinet colleagues over migration curbs, with his critics accusing him of being overly cautious and “arguing like an accountant seeing the risk of everything”. 

The FT says the Cabinet is discussing a plan under which the UK would still pay billions into the EU in return for the City being given access to the single market. 

“MPs will try to delay leaving EU” is the headline in the Express, which reports that former Lib Dem leader Nick Clegg is leading a group which wants a Commons vote before Article 50 is triggered. 

The Guardian pictures the celebrations in Abuja as 21 of the girls kidnapped by Boko Haram in 2014 return home. Some 200 are still being held by the Islamist militant movement. 

Camley’s Cartoon

The Herald:

Camley phones home to suggest how to boost GP intake AND save rural phone boxes. Read the story here.

 

FFS: Five in five seconds

The Herald:

What’s the story? Scottish Conservatives leader Ruth Davidson has made another appearance on Have I Got News for You. 

Funny? More funny peculiar than funny ha-ha. She again refused to say that she had confidence in Boris Johnson as Foreign Secretary.

Again? On October 3 she was asked the same question three times by BBC Politics Scotland’s Gordon Brewer. Last Friday the furthest she would go was: “I think he’s got a tough job and he’s giving it his best.”  Even allowing for Ms Davidson’s determination to put clear, blue (collar) water between herself and the Tories in Westminster, her reluctance to back her own government’s Foreign Secretary, and this time on prime-time national TV, is remarkable. 

Is Boris bovvered? Boris has other problems this morning. It emerged yesterday that two days before making a decision on whether to back Leave or Remain, he wrote twin newspaper articles, one for and one against. In the Remain piece, revealed by the Sunday Times’ political editor Tim Shipman in a new book, All Out War, Johnson said Brexit would cause an "economic shock" and could lead to the break up of the UK. “It is perfectly true that back in February I was wrestling with [the issue],” he admitted yesterday. Read political editor Tom Gordon's report here. 

Back to Ruth. Any further movement on that Boris position? She did eventually concede:  “I think he’d be excellent on Strictly Come Dancing.”

Afore Ye Go

Post-conference, the SNP chief exec Peter Murrell takes a daunder down memory lane, though we're assuming he did not personally attend the 1956 gathering.

The Herald:

“You were mincing around that stage darling like you were in an episode of Some Mothers Do ‘Ave ‘Em. You made Frank Spencer look butch. Dreadful."

Strictly judge Craig Revel Horwood is left cold by Ed Balls’ paso doble, complete with silk cape, silver shoes and glittery tights. Guy Levy/BBC/PA Wire 

Still on Ed Balls watch.

Former LibDem leader Nick Clegg launches an assault on the language.

The Herald:

“Her decision to join Labour and accept a peerage from [Jeremy] Corbyn, along with her recent appointment to his shadow cabinet, has thrown into question the independence of her inquiry.”

The Home Affairs Committee’s finding on Labour efforts to counter anti-semitism, and the report produced by Shami Chakrabarti, now Shadow Attorney General, on the matter. Mr Corbyn called the criticism of Ms Chakrabarti “unfair”. Jeff J Mitchell/Getty Images

The Herald:

“A racist, elitist, xenophobic, despicably superior snob.”

Broadcaster Piers Morgan’s view of John Cleese after the former Python’s tweet about “half-educated tenement Scots”. Morgan, above, said he would like to send Cleese and Jeremy Paxman to a Siberian cave where they could bore each other to death. Event magazine. Andrew Reddington/Getty Images

The Herald:

"He said I tortured him with bringing him vegan food."

Former Baywatch star Pamela Anderson after visiting WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange in the Ecuadorian Embassy, where he has been living for four years. Steve Parsons/PA Wire

If Carlsberg made election ads.

The Herald:

“Bob Dylan was awarded the Nobel Prize for literature. Dylan was like, ‘This is the greatest honor I’ve ever received.’ Or he might have said, ‘Misses gravy’s on her ivory steed.’ It’s impossible to tell.”

Late Night with Seth Myers. Via newsmax.com Frazer Harrison/Getty Images

The Herald:

“Election is being rigged by the media, in a co-ordinated effort with the Clinton campaign, by putting stories that never happened into news.”

Republican nominee Donald Trump tweets claims the US presidential election is a fix. Kena Betancur/Getty Images

The Herald:

“Our democracy relies on confidence in election results, and the speaker is fully confident the states will carry out this election with integrity.”

A spokesperson for House Speaker Paul Ryan responds to the Trump claims.  Mark Wilson/Getty Images

Meanwhile, here's Saturday Night Live's take on the last debate, and, below, Trump's reaction to it.

Thanks for reading. See you tomorrow. Twitter: @alisonmrowat