FRESH humiliation for put-upon millionaire Anas Sarwar, the favourite turned also-ran in the Scottish Labour leadership race. After a disastrous start to his campaign, when he was unable to escape from his gilded background and rum goings-on at the family firm, dad hotfooted it back from Pakistan last week to lend “moral support” ie hit the phones. Now Holyrood has added to the grief with publication of a minute of the AGM of the Cross Party Group on Pakistan. Among the MSPs listed as attending is one “Anus Sarwar”. Bummer.

HE’S not the only one. Former SNP Westminster leader Angus Robertson once got the “Anus” treatment in one of his party’s own press releases. Little has been seen of him since he lost his Moray seat in June. But Unspun hears a new gig is at hand. A Nat mole reports Mr R, who is still depute SNP leader, is being lined up for a cosy job at SNP HQ. When Tory MEP Ian Duncan was handed a peerage after not getting elected, the SNP denounced it as a “reward for failure”. So this would obviously be completely different.

MORE news on Paul Jukes, the fun-enforcing chief executive of North Lanarkshire Council. Apparently miffed at Unspun’s coverage of his wheeze of ten pin bowling for new politicians, his woes mounted last week as the administration tried to hide the names of councillors owing council tax. Of four in arrears, two have paid up. As to the others? Let’s just say that if a clean tab was needed to go bowling, the SNP team might well be two down.

ALEX Salmond continues his cheesy light entertainment career with a Borders leg on his “Unleashed” tour. His website carries a high-brow commendation. “Salmond charmed a home crowd - New York Times.” Alas, the quote didn’t appear in the famous paper of record, but the less classy New York Daily News. It wasn’t even by a US reviewer, but a Reuters reporter based in Scotland. Her reminder that Eck was “the senior Scottish nationalist to have lost his parliamentary seat” is strangely missing from his blurb.

FANS of BBC sitcom W1A are advised to read this week’s report on the gender pay gap at Holyrood (too many male bosses, surprise, surprise). Like the BBC apparatchiks forever spouting management gobbledygook, it declares: “We are looking at our values again and defining what leadership and management means.” It then adds: “We have engaged with an external development provider to develop our leaders on an individual and collective basis.” Translation: there's another taxpayer-funded consultant on the books. Just like the Beeb!

TALKING of the gender pay gap, employability Minister Jamie Hepburn was humiliated as he over-ran in a debate on it this week. “There we must end,” deputy PO Christine Grahame told him curtly. “I agree with-” he went on. “No, minister,” she growled. At which rent-a-gaffe Nat John Mason chuckled: “I thank the Presiding Officer for protecting the back benchers against the front benchers.” When Mr Mason gets the last laugh, it’s a very bad day indeed.

A SORE week too for Scottish Labour chief whip James Kelly, who was one of Mr Sarwar’s first declared leadership supporters. A well-placed Labour source swears Mr Kelly is having second thoughts, even canvassing on behalf of rival candidate Richard Leonard. Mr Kelly denied it to Unspun, but the sound of gritted teeth as he did so was almost deafening.