Wake-up call

WE are well down memory lane today as a new book about great sixties Glasgow band The Beatstalkers, written by band members and journalist Martin Kielty, is being launched at The Clutha a week on Thursday. The book tells how singer Davie Lennox tried to avoid all the "Stalkermania" from fans by sleeping as much as possible. Says Davie in the book: "I slept in for a gig in the Barrowland – it was terrible. It was due to start at nine o’clock. I finally woke up and jumped on a bus, really late. When I arrived all the fans were in tears… somebody had started a rumour that I’d got knocked down by a bus at Boots' Corner and I was dead. When I went on they were euphoric. As a guilt-trip for sleeping in I would have put more into it than usual!”

Boots' Corner - now that really is a slice of Glasgow nostalgia.

In the hunt

GROWING old continued. An Anniesland reader tells us: "Now at an age where my wife and I have our own Easter hunt - I hunt for her glasses and she looks for my car keys."

News to Ann

STRONG stuff from Have I Got News For You presenter Paul Merton in today's Radio Times who declares: "My worst experience was when Ann Widdecombe hosted it the second time. Now, there’s a thing in showbusiness. The first time you do something, you’re going to be a bit rabbit-caught-in-the-headlights, but adrenaline gets you through. Then the programme is edited and her friends see it and say, 'Oh, you were very good on that.' Second time she comes on she’s telling the producer what jokes will and won’t work. Suddenly she thought she was Victoria Wood!”

Punch line

A READER flying off on holiday for Easter emails us: "Our flight was delayed for more than two hours but fortunately the kids had their electronic devices and seemed quite happy sitting there watching films and music videos. I remember when I was a kid we would never have spent two hours without at least one of our parents threatening us with physical violence if we didn't behave."

By the letter

HONESTLY, it's just a joke, and we have nothing against such a fine place, but Martin Morrison gets in touch to muse: "There are only a handful of words in the English language that contain the letter sequence 'rrh'. I’ve listed a few. Gonorrhoea, diarrhoea, pyorrhoea and haemorrhoid. Oh, and Barrhead."

Let's talk

A WEST End reader hears a woman in a Byres Road coffee shop confide to her pal: "Yes, I know you get your house back when your kids finally leave, but it's double-edged sword - it makes it harder to avoid talking to your husband."

In a comma

OUR stories about using punctuation incorrectly reminds Urpu Sellar: “When she was of primary school age my daughter said she wanted to be ‘nothing like my mommy’. I still don’t know if she meant ‘I want to be nothing, like my mommy’ or ‘nothing like my mommy’. She is 35 now.”

Got the hang of it

TODAY'S piece of daftness comes from Ian Power who says: "My neighbour and I often race each other when we put washing on our lines. We're level pegging right now."