STRANGE how things that were once the norm now seem so alien.
A Bearsden mum tells us her son was visiting his granny where he was puzzled by a small, lumpy piece of material, and asked what it was.
"A pin cushion," replied gran.
"Why do you want to make your pins comfortable?" he asked.
Alarming call
CAR repairs continued. David Brownlee recounts a friend who had to take his new expensive car back to the dealer as its alarm was going off for no reason. Says David: "Three trips to the dealer and lots of scratching of heads did not solve the problem, for as usual the problem did not arise in the garage. That night his wife asked if he had fitted the kitchen smoke alarm she had thoughtfully placed in his toolbox in the boot of his car so he would not forget to do so."
Remote control
A west end woman was telling her friends she and her husband were running late to go out for dinner with her parents when he shouted at her: "I can't find my phone."
She thought she came up with a smart reply when she told him: "Just take the TV remote, put it on the table, and stare at it instead."
Sporting spirit
THAT great golfing occasion the Ryder Cup is coming to Gleneagles next year. Kenny Reid wonders if there are other Scottish connections with the trophy. In the 1950s the Ryder Cup took place at Thunderbird Country Club and Eldorado Country Club in the US and Kenny is curious as to whether both clubs were started by jaikie Scotsmen.
Say what you mean
BUS conversations continued. A reader on the 66 bus heard a young girl ask her pal: "Does this skirt unflatter me badly?"
He mentally agreed with the pal who replied: "I wouldn't even know how to answer that question."
Healthy attitude
JUNIOR Health Minister at Westminster Anna Soubry says smoking in cars should be banned to protect children.
As one smoker who drives his kids to school tells us: "I've decided not to smoke with the kids in the car.
"The walk will do them good."
Put the boot in
BOY band crooner Harry Styles of One Direction, below, was hit in the "haw maws" as one fan put it, by a shoe thrown by a girl at his Glasgow concert. It reminds us of when an Iraqi journalist threw his shoes at then President George W Bush who managed to duck. When asked about it after Bush calmly replied: "If you want the facts, it was a size 10."
Why are you making commenting on The Herald only available to subscribers?
It should have been a safe space for informed debate, somewhere for readers to discuss issues around the biggest stories of the day, but all too often the below the line comments on most websites have become bogged down by off-topic discussions and abuse.
heraldscotland.com is tackling this problem by allowing only subscribers to comment.
We are doing this to improve the experience for our loyal readers and we believe it will reduce the ability of trolls and troublemakers, who occasionally find their way onto our site, to abuse our journalists and readers. We also hope it will help the comments section fulfil its promise as a part of Scotland's conversation with itself.
We are lucky at The Herald. We are read by an informed, educated readership who can add their knowledge and insights to our stories.
That is invaluable.
We are making the subscriber-only change to support our valued readers, who tell us they don't want the site cluttered up with irrelevant comments, untruths and abuse.
In the past, the journalist’s job was to collect and distribute information to the audience. Technology means that readers can shape a discussion. We look forward to hearing from you on heraldscotland.com
Comments & Moderation
Readers’ comments: You are personally liable for the content of any comments you upload to this website, so please act responsibly. We do not pre-moderate or monitor readers’ comments appearing on our websites, but we do post-moderate in response to complaints we receive or otherwise when a potential problem comes to our attention. You can make a complaint by using the ‘report this post’ link . We may then apply our discretion under the user terms to amend or delete comments.
Post moderation is undertaken full-time 9am-6pm on weekdays, and on a part-time basis outwith those hours.
Read the rules hereComments are closed on this article