WE mentioned that Celtic Music Radio's folk music benefit gig for the Clutha fund the other day.

Showing the couthy humour of folk musicians, a reader noticed one of the acts struggling to get through the doors of the hall with an array of guitars and banjos. A fellow musician going to his aid remarked: "You've got more instruments than good songs."

Text speak

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A READER waiting for a train at Hyndland station heard a student type look at his beeping phone and then tell his pal: "That's my mother sending me a text. I'll give it five minutes then she'll phone me to see if I got it."

Fat chance

HOW is the New Year health regime coming along? A member in a city centre gym tells us he heard another member tell his pal in the changing room: "Only another week or so until the number of people attending here goes back to normal. You can see it on their faces. It's all too much for them.".

Paradise remembered

FOOTBALL fans will be saddened by the death of Bobby Collins, the Scotland and Celtic star who went on to become a great player for both Everton and Leeds. Showing it was a different era in the 1950s, a south side reader who lived near Bobby, known as The Wee Barra, once explained: "I drove a Pollokshaws Co-op bread van, and often gave Bobby a lift to Celtic's home games. No Porsches or BMWs for the players then."

A right to-do

A BACKBENCH Tory MP, Peter Bone, wants a bank holiday in Britain to be renamed Margaret Thatcher Day. Our contact from what remains of the left wing of the Labour Party in Scotland tells us: "There's no need. With current Government policies every day is Thatcher Day these days."

Put the nave into naive

THE Herald ran a story yesterday about Stonelaw Church in Rutherglen unearthing a time capsule buried in its walls over a hundred years ago. As the church later tweeted: "Today we're in The Herald - quoted, photographed and even a leader comment - and no mention of sex or scandals!"


AN observer of the French political scene watches the difficulties of President Francoise Hollande and opines: "It's just like a modern-day fairytale. Pretty girl kisses the frog, which sends the frog's partner to hospital suffering from shock."

My precious

WE'VE mentioned Solihull Police's informal approach when using Twitter. This week it asked for help in tracing the owner of a stolen ring. They later said they had turned away a chap who said it was his - and published a picture of Gollum wearing a Burberry cap.

Take note

A COLLEAGUE wanders over to discuss gambling. He told us his tale of woe: "Put a tenner on a horse. Waste of time. As soon as it moved, it fell off."