ACADEMICS don't half talk some tosh.
I've held that view for some time - dating back to a sentence I served as an undergrad at Edinburgh University. And my prejudice was reinforced yesterday when I read a report that claimed that shopping boosts kids' happiness levels.
The study, carried out by Oxford boffins and The Open University, argued that shopping is "particularly significant in relation to child happiness". An OU bod said: "Children are getting visual stimulation, they are getting out of the house and into a new environment, they are bumping into other families where social skills come into play, and they may get the chance to do something physical in a shop like run around."
The paper, based on a survey completed by more than 800 parents of two and three-year-olds, added: "Child happiness is positively related to engagement in more active activities, such as reading or telling stories, going shopping and painting."
Up to a point, Lord Copper. In Nineteen Oatcake Leith, shopping was certainly an active pursuit, though it was hardly a joyful one. It consisted largely of having a crumpled piece of paper wrapped around a handful of change shoved into my juvenile mitt and being told to run to Maloney's, our local corner shop, for the messages (one such occasion, resented to this day, involved being sent out for 10 Woodbines and a pint of milk during the 1966 World Cup final; I missed the West German equaliser).
Whether that is a contributory factor or not, I've hated shopping ever since; it's a chore, not therapy.
The weekly supermarket shop is a case in point. I start off with the best of intentions; I can just about keep my interest going through aisles 1-3 (fruit and veg), but then I lapse into a trance state until the haven of aisles 17-20 (bevvy). In the meantime my other half has incomprehensibly spent an age comparing various plug-in air fresheners and vainly sought my views on the relative merits of Aqua Blast and Citrus Fresh bleach (I know, I know; I should care, these things matter).
Then there is the lottery of selecting which checkout queue to join. This is the ultimate manifestation of Sod's Law; the person with the least amount of shopping to unpack will invariably be the one with an item whose price is unknown, prompting a Dr Stanley-style expedition of discovery from a teenage sloth.
There is hope, though. At the weekend, by way of a change, we went to an Asda superstore; they have a creche near the entrance. If you're looking for me next Saturday, check out the soft-play ball pool.
Why are you making commenting on The Herald only available to subscribers?
It should have been a safe space for informed debate, somewhere for readers to discuss issues around the biggest stories of the day, but all too often the below the line comments on most websites have become bogged down by off-topic discussions and abuse.
heraldscotland.com is tackling this problem by allowing only subscribers to comment.
We are doing this to improve the experience for our loyal readers and we believe it will reduce the ability of trolls and troublemakers, who occasionally find their way onto our site, to abuse our journalists and readers. We also hope it will help the comments section fulfil its promise as a part of Scotland's conversation with itself.
We are lucky at The Herald. We are read by an informed, educated readership who can add their knowledge and insights to our stories.
That is invaluable.
We are making the subscriber-only change to support our valued readers, who tell us they don't want the site cluttered up with irrelevant comments, untruths and abuse.
In the past, the journalist’s job was to collect and distribute information to the audience. Technology means that readers can shape a discussion. We look forward to hearing from you on heraldscotland.com
Comments & Moderation
Readers’ comments: You are personally liable for the content of any comments you upload to this website, so please act responsibly. We do not pre-moderate or monitor readers’ comments appearing on our websites, but we do post-moderate in response to complaints we receive or otherwise when a potential problem comes to our attention. You can make a complaint by using the ‘report this post’ link . We may then apply our discretion under the user terms to amend or delete comments.
Post moderation is undertaken full-time 9am-6pm on weekdays, and on a part-time basis outwith those hours.
Read the rules hereComments are closed on this article