CONFUSING this Mother's Day being a different day around the world. A South Side mother received a call from her son in America wishing her a happy Mother's Day on Sunday only to tell him: "You're two months late, which I suppose for you is not too bad." Ouch.

We did like American comedian Bobby Moynihan who used the American Mother's Day to apologise to his mum for something that happened in his childhood. Said Bobby: "Hey Mom, I'm sorry that I drew my name on the wall in marker and then blamed it on Grandma. Then you said, 'How did grandma get up and write that when she is in a wheelchair?' And I said, 'It's a miracle!'"

POLITICAL talk yesterday was on Nigel Farage taking back his resignation as leader of Ukip. Glasgow SNP MSP Humza Yousaf was perhaps thinking of a political leader nearer to home when he commented: "Farage unresigns, incredible! Can you imagine the brass neck of someone losing seats, only clinging on to one MP and yet remaining leader..."

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On a sweeter note, someone with an ear tuned to pop culture remarked: "If nothing else, Nigel Farage is giving hope to Zayn Malik fans."

THE more cheerful political news was the happy smiling new SNP MPs arriving at Westminster. Said Bradley Booth: "Can you imagine the scenes at the Westminster cafeteria as 56 SNP MPs try to use Scottish notes, and argue, 'I'm telling you it IS legal tender'."

ANOTHER headline was on businessman Lord Sugar resigning from the Labour Party - but keeping the title that they gave him of course. A party member tries to look on the bright side by telling us: "Well at least we can put on our posters in the future 'A Sugar-free Labour Party' if that helps us with the more weight conscious out there."

THERE are a few folk in Glasgow pubs who would agree with Ian Power who comments on an age-old question: "Some people like to think of the glass as half empty, some half full. Either way, I wish they'd drink faster and get a round in."

ED Miliband's brother David has criticised Ed's leadership of the Labour Party. But he adds in his interview with the BBC that the two of them would "remain brothers for life". Goodness, Labour must really miss that level of insight.

WITH the Tories back in power, a spoof Twitter account, 50 Shades of Tory, compares the Government to that much talked about book. One example that makes a few folk think is: "As she lay there, trembling and powerless to resist, Iain Duncan Smith threw away her wheelchair and declared her fit for work."

OUR gag about how many Scottish Labour MPs it takes to change a lightbulb - all of them - is challenged by reader Harry Clarke who says: "How many Labour MPs in Scotland does it take to change a lightbulb?

"Change? CHANGE? Why do we have to change anything?"

AND a postscript to the election count last week. Said Ross Craig: "I liked the live reports from Scottish election counts. It's the only time the rest of the UK gets to see us in a gym."