THIS hasn't been the best of times for High Street chain BhS. We suspect the company could do with more customers like the one overheard by John Millar at the Sauchiehall Street store. With shoppers thronging to take advantage of heavily-discounted goods, a wee wummin struggled to lay down a mountain of towels and bedding on the counter. She told the assistant: "I don't really need any of this stuff. But I just wanted to come in and help you oot!"

THE late, great George Wyllie was a colourful character in both his art and his private life, as evidenced by a newly-launched biography written by his elder daughter Louise and arts writer Jan Patience. Arrivals and Sailings, published by Polygon, has this rather fetching anecdote on page 110. "George became renowned locally, and with thankfully understanding neighbours, George went on to produce work he felt confident enough to put on public view.

"Louise remembers awkward times when friends and particular boyfriends came to visit the house and her father would emerge from the cellar looking like Rab C. Nesbitt on a bad day, clothing peppered with holes from the welding torches. There would be a giant knife and fork on the living room wall and a crocodile in the corner chomping on wine glasses. There was either loads of conversation or none. Daphne went to lay the table for her guests on one occasion only to find all the knives and forks missing – gone into a sculpture earlier in the day!"

HYDRO, more of: And an intriguing submission from Simon Paterson. Several years ago, he and the family were invited into the SECC boardroom for a glass of wine. In the room was a model of the proposed new building in a glass case. "I remarked that it looked like a jellyfish," recalls Simon. "I was swiftly asked to keep my voice down and not mention the name elsewhere. This I did and have done faithfully (until now)." We think the SSE Jellyfish could catch on. Especially if bands such as Ocean Colour Scene, The Coral or Eels are lined up to play.

OTHER entries:

* How about Hydrophobia for those with a fear of heights or loud noise? - John Mulholland

* The Concertina - Maureen Hutchison

* Tilty Pie/Pie on the Side - David Walker.

Jim McDonald, however, observes: "Since first clapping eyes on the Hydro I have referred to it as 'The Ashet' as it looks like a big pie dish and may sometimes be full of mince."

More suggestions on Monday.

DAVID Donaldson found himself driving behind an estate car with the registration MI FLU. It struck him as rather odd until he noticed the huge ladders strapped to the car roof indicating that the driver was a chimney sweep. "I'd have taken a snap with my phone but the law rather disapproves of that sort of thing," he adds, sagely.

PORTLAND, Oregon group Richmond Fontaine played Glasgow earlier this week. Mike Ritchie says lead singer Willy Vlautin writes most of the songs and is also a novelist, with one book already turned into a film. He happily mixes the two skills. As he said recently: "Well, my heart has always been in the novel, but I like being in a band and writing songs. When I was a kid I had a picture of John Steinbeck on my wall beside a picture of the Jam. That says it all, really.”