It’s been a good week for ... school dinners
Prince George has started at Thomas’s Preparatory School in Battersea. The school dinner menu at the elite London establishment includes lamb ragout with garlic and herbs, smoked mackerel on a bed of puy lentils and pork stroganoff with red peppers.
When I grew up, school lunch was a staple and meant every child had a full tummy no matter what their circumstances.
You may think I’m going to slag off those 1970s school menus as dull and bland. But I look back with fondness.
OK, the predominant odour wafting through the school from 11am onwards was cabbage. But, weirdly, we didn’t eat that much cabbage. The abiding memory is of mashed tattie served via an ice-cream scoop with hearty stews and mince. Lots of mince.
As a colourful twist, there was often diced, pickled beetroot, a delicacy for which I could never develop a palate. Making friends with a dinner lady was, therefore, all important. On polite request, you would be slipped just one cube of said delight on the understanding that you would quickly smear it round your plate to give the appearance of having consumed the required portion. Just enough to turn your ice-cream-scoop tatties a vibrant shade of pink.
This was important, as the dinner police were ever vigilant. Mrs Brown was chief, and would swoop on reluctant diners with a glinting knife and fork, descending with fury to cut up anything left on a neglected plate in order to aid consumption. It didn’t matter what the dish of the day happened to be. Mince sustained the same demonic treatment as a chunky stew.
So we ate up, with Mrs Brown hovering. And we grew strong and healthy.
Young George would be advised to do likewise. Mrs Brown’s spirit lives on, and even a puy lentil cannot escape the chop.
It’s been a bad week for ... capital gains
A nationwide study has concluded that Edinburgh is the unhappiest place in the UK. Research by 9NINE Super Seed brand, found that just 16 per cent of the city's residents described their lives as “happy”, favouring the words “anxious” and “depressed”.
As for general life satisfaction, Edinburgh came bottom with an average of 5.89 out of 10.
Oh well ... you’ll have had your tee-hee.
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