INSTEAD of hurtling round Scotland perhaps the Three Amigos of the Apocalypse, aka Cameron, Clegg and Miliband, should follow the Zen-like path of Alistair Carmichael.
We hear the LibDem Scottish Secretary will be at home in Orkney this weekend, as is his custom, just days from the biggest vote in 300 years.
As he might put it in his soft island burr, "Relax, Dave, it's only the Union, you know."
ALSO needing to calm down is John Prescott, who yesterday topped his brainwave for a Scots and English football team by attacking his erstwhile Tory allies.
"Bloody 'ell, they've ripped our families apart for decades," he ranted helpfully in Rutherglen.
Perhaps a nice foot massage would help. If he can take it out his mouth.
MEANWHILE, Alex Salmond staged a reconciliation with his old deputy Jim Sillars near Edinburgh's Easter Road.
Some divides, however, remain eternal. Passing with his dog, ex-council boss and massive Hibbee John Mulvey bumped into Steve Cardownie, the capital's Hearts-mad SNP deputy.
"Watch it, Stevie," Mulvey said, "she bites Jambos."
Which is strange really, as all Hibbees know Jambos have a terrible taste.
THE biggest debate yet kicks off tonight with 8,000 voters aged 16 and 17 at Glasgow Hydro.
The BBC booked the £400K gig before consulting the FM or Alistair Darling. Both ran a mile.
"Imagine all those teenagers talking, texting and God knows what?" gasped a No camp source.
Hence the event's nickname, the Hormone Dome.
LABOUR MSP Dave Stewart is fuming after picking up an unwanted passenger in Wick.
While he leafleted for the Union, a large Yes sticker was slapped on the bumper of his new car.
Now it needs a paint job.
It seems Labour's support really is peeling away everywhere.
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