IT was double deja vu at SNP conference as Westminster boss Angus Robertson opened proceedings. His speech had a fiery passage about Theresa May ignoring Scots on Brexit. If she could ignore on us that “it is clear our voice and our interests can be ignored at any time and on any issue”, he thundered. Alas, it had all been cut and pasted from Nicola Sturgeon’s speech on Monday. Clearly, there would be a lot of recycling after independence..
IT’S official! The UK is doomed! Why? Because Scotland in Union launched the No side’s fightback in the most cursed room in Scottish politics last week. The top floor of Glasgow’s Lighthouse also jinxed the SNP’s 2003 manifesto launch, Labour’s 2007 manifesto launch, Wendy Alexander’s Labour leadership bid shortly afterwards, Labour’s flailing election relaunch in 2011, and Jackson Carlaw’s Tory leadership bid the same year. Convinced now?
FRESH news on Fulton ‘No Show’ MacGregor, the hustings-phobic SNP MSP for Coatbridge. Shortly after being elected, No Show was interviewed by a cub reporter from local team Albion Rovers. Scary huh? Apparently, as No Show’s office demanded all the questions in advance so he could prep for his grilling. Sweaty posers included “How are you?”, “What’s your first memory of the Rovers?” and “How many games do you get to?” Brutal stuff.
NO Show has made such an impression even his own colleagues can’t put a name to his face. The official report of a recent Education Committee records SNP convener James Dornan saying: “I call Ross. Sorry - Fulton. [Laughter.]” To which No Show laments: “You are my next-door neighbour in the Parliament, so I thought that you would get my name right.” After he finished, Mr Dornan summed it up: “That was Fulton MacGregor, folks.” Quite so.
THOSE dreading another referendum should brace themselves: Pat Kane is back. As soon as Nicola Sturgeon spoke on Monday, the prolix pop-memory started burbling away as vice-convenor of the Scottish Independence Convention. His knack for the florid remains undimmed, we fear. His top tips for pro-indy campaigners? “Be the Scotland you wish to see. Take the high road. Be the candle, not the darkness.” Only two years to go. At least...
THERE was also Pat’s view on a Unionist victory. “It’s the ultimate choice,” he declared. “If we don’t win this argument for indy… then we can certainly put the constitutional question to rest in Scotland, for this generation at least.” Mmm. Where have we heard that before?
TALKING of retro sounds, Scottish Labour spindoctor Alan Roden indulged his love of musical theatre again this week, seeing Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat for a seventh time. He rates the new Joseph, former X Factor winner Joe McElderry, as second only to “the master”, Jason Donovan. His fav song? Any Dream Will Do, featuring the lyric: “I return to the beginning/The light is dimming, and the dream is too.” Perfect for Jeremy Corbyn.
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