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Impolitic: Salmond v Darling and why undecided Scots should not get a vote in indyref

The lucky suit has returned from the dry cleaners, the hair trimmer is switched to turbo boost, chopping off unsightly nasal and ear hair.

The bushy eye-brows have even been brought under control. What's left of the hair on the head is trimmed and for once, you know what, he actually looks good.

The lights are on, make-up applied, the cameras are tight. Sharp, alert, ready for the inevitable barrage and onslaught and bombardment of questions, ducking and diving, bobbing and weaving, all in high definition…but enough about Professor John Curtice of Strathclyde University.

Yes the guvnor was back in full effect this week, he and David Torrance were never off TV. Torrance, the man with the media specs and slick quiff was all over the referendum debate story and on every news outlet. They are on for a reason, at times, they are better than the politicians at effectively communicating in a clear and concise fashion.

Two issues struck me. One was the definite sense of occasion to the historic TV referendum debate, it really felt as if everyone was tuning into a huge event. The same way in the 1970s, when Scotland were quite good at football with Dalglish and Jordan, playing at Anfield against Wales to qualify for the World Cup. More recently, the anticipation was similar to watching Andy Murray win at Wimbledon in 2013. It just felt invigorating, it felt good and exciting.

Those outside Scotland who wanted to watch on STV Player couldn't because of unprecedented demand for the live stream of the debate.

The second was how much I misjudged Salmond's performance. Apart from the currency issue and 'no plan B', I thought he did much better than reported. You also have to remind yourself that this is politics and no matter how big an event, it would still be two intelligent men whose job it was not to give straight answers, schooled in saying a lot without giving anything away.

I was organised, had my soda water, loads of ice and Vimto, 'there will be no bevvying'. I sat down with my foolscap note book and pen, small black Moleskine sketchbook, (actually it's a popular supermarket copy of a Moleskine, do I look like Rockefeller?) but no less cool. Incidentally, to anyone under the age of 21, these are old tools of the trade, old dudes used to write stuff down before Twitter, Facebook, iPads and the like. However, I am slowly evolving and embraced the white heat of technology by following the debate on Twitter as well taping it on Betamax.

The actual debate, at times, was like watching football. The over confident flair player guilty of playing to the camera and showboating, a maverick who doesn't play by the rules (no plan B for currency) showing scant disregard for the opposition. Then the boring Mourinho non football approach, from Darling, pin-pointing the opposition's weakness and driving at it, continually pounding and exploiting the weakest part. It makes for a rubbish game of football and equally, especially for those looking for answers, a frustrating TV debate. Salmond, at one point, looked like it was too easy for him, but underestimated his opponent, let it slip and Darling stuck to the game plan and won. By the time the debate was distilled through the eyes of network broadcasters, you would've thought you were watching Salmond being slaughtered. ITV and BBC evening news bulletins then Newsnight all gave the bout to Darling. Everyone at home and on social media seemed annoyed that no one was answering questions. Welcome to politics.

I also found myself watching and listening for the defining sound bite. Whoever got the message across would win. Darling's retort about not voting for Alex Salmond but getting him, you knew that would be on the news. He used 'best of both worlds' and the classic 'plan B'. Getting the message out there worked.

The following day while going for a paper (again, for younger readers, that's a printed periodical containing news, popular before the internet). You knew when the message filtered down to council workers, cutting grass in the park saying 'aye Salmond's got no plan B.' In the shop, women were discussing the currency union and 'Salmond not having a plan B'.

Later in the afternoon while on the train travelling to Edinburgh I heard three affable and quite funny guys, already started on their cargo at three in the afternoon heading for the festival, wisecracking all the way through, looking out at planes flying overhead pretending to phone the pilot and ask if he had a plan B if the engines failed? If they missed the last train home did they have plan B? By Thursday's FMQs and Johann Lamont's 'plan B' assault it was close to plan B mania.

In the end, it was still about winning over the undecided. Alex Salmond claimed he made inroads in winning them over. I'm not happy with the 'undecided' I'd go as far as to say they can't truly exist. You either engage in politics or invest in the narrative or you don't.

George Orwell said: "In our age there is no such thing as 'keeping out of politics.' All issues are political issues, and politics itself is a mass of lies, evasions, folly, hatred and schizophrenia." With that in mind, I don't believe people are undecided when they say they are. They are indecisive not undecided. How can people possibly not have made their mind which way to vote having had years to consider and research? If you're undecided you're an idiot and don't deserve the chance to vote.

Two stories this week that may ruin David Cameron's holiday. Baroness Warsi, the first Muslim woman in the cabinet resigned on Tuesday, accusing Cameron's government of taking a "morally indefensible" approach to the conflict between Israel and Hamas. Warsi was part of the new modern image of the party. Better still, she kept a diary, I look forward to that political memoir.

Secondly, the return of Boris Johnson which had Cameron joking and tweeting in a sea of sycophancy as he accepted his pal back into the team. Cameron should be wary, the Tory grass roots love bungling Boris, they think he has the 'personality' and broader reach to connect with new voters in a way Thatcher did. On Sky News, as the story broke with Cameron and Johnson they played a loop of them limply, clumsily and ineffectively trying to play tennis. It tells you everything; hopelessly out of position, no sense of grace and always misreading the play.

If you are still undecided and Cameron and Johnson running your country even though you didn't vote isn't enough then maybe Dan Snow's ridiculously huge and impractical letter should do it. Big Dan, who organised the lovely letter to Scotland to stick together, his father-in-law is the Duke of Westminster, one of the richest property tycoons in the country (worth £8 billion, fourth in the rich list), I'm not saying he isn't a nice guy and may have a social conscience but he's hardly having to Google his nearest food bank. By now, please tell me you've made a decision and please don't let people like Simon Cowell, David Walliams, John Barrowman and the Knights; Mick, Cliff and Brucey's grovelling obsequiousness fool you.

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