HOVERING with a large smirk over the Commons chamber was the ghost of Christmas future - Alex Salmond.
The First Nationalist hasn't even arrived at Westminster yet and his presence is filling the heated air between the baying Tory and Labour benches.
The chief comrade set off at a rattling pace, trying to up-end the PM with another attack on the moribund mare that is the leaders' debates.
As Red Ed mentioned head-to-heads Tory berserkers roared their disapproval and the prime ministerial eyes rolled around like balls in a pinball machine. Clucking noises began to be heard from the red team.
Blue Dave, having been goaded, goaded back, and urged Ed to bring on the seven-cornered debate on March 23 he had agreed to.
But then the Tory toff unleashed his Nationalist barb, noting how it was now obvious Labour could not win the election without the aid of the SNP.
"He says we need the two leaders, we need the two leaders who can call the tune; that's me and Alex Salmond. So let's have the debate." Which sounded like he was proposing a head-to-head with the First Nationalist; but, of course, he wasn't. The debate in question was the seven-cornered one.
Denouncing Mr C's "pathetic and feeble excuses", the Labour chief had another go but the PM with a flourish produced a Scottish Labour campaign leaflet, claiming it showed Labour had given up on wanting to be a majority government and simply wanted to be the largest party.
To Tory howls, Blue Dave barked: "They're not trying to win, they're just trying to crawl through the gates of Downing Street on the coat-tails of the SNP. So what he's got to do is prove he's not a chicken and rule that out."
Quick as a flash, Red Ed jumped up and shouted: "There's only one person preparing for defeat and it's this Prime Minister!"
But then the insults flew. After more barbs bounced off the Cameron armour, the PM declared how his opposite number was "weak and despicable" for wanting to "crawl to power in Alex Salmond's pocket".
Branding Dave a "bully running for cover," the chief comrade retaliated, sniping: "There's only one person who is a risk to the integrity of the UK and it's this useless Prime Minister."
All the while, Angus Robertson and his merry band of Nationalists were engaged in a smirkathon; never had the SNP been so name-checked at PMQs.
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