I missed the Champions Trophy in Argentina with an injury so thought I might get an opportunity last week, but it didn't happen.
I was really proud of the girls though for doing so well and bringing back the gold. It was strange to be on the other side of the action, but it was good to be at Olympic Park and see the progress that has been made.
The atmosphere in the hockey stadium was really good. Sitting up in the stand you didn't necessarily appreciate how loud it was, but the girls said they were just amazed by the noise and could barely hear each other on the pitch. We all really appreciated the efforts that everyone made to come out and support the team. It made such a big difference.
As a squad we have been decentralised this week, so it's been nice to be home and catch up on all the little things that you don't get a chance to do when you are training full time: paperwork, bills and e-mails, that sort of thing. It's also nice to have time to do some of the more general mummy things like organising the book shelf and toy boxes.
I do find it hard being away from home so much. I miss my family and that can be tough. But the upside is I feel like I lead a bit of a double life. I get to run away for hockey and then come back and have a normal life with my family at home.
I have just picked up my new BMW 1 Series Coupe. A few of the other GB girls have been sponsored by BMW so I thought there was no harm in asking too, and to my surprise they said yes. It is absolutely amazing and I am so thankful to the John Clark dealership in Dundee. It's a huge help with all of the travelling that I do up and down the country. I've never been a car person, but I definitely am now.
Next week the squad is back together at Bisham Abbey and then the final Olympic selection will be announced on the 18th. It's one of those things that you know is coming and you just can't avoid it. But it's also what we signed up for when we started this campaign. There are 28 people in the squad and only 16 will be picked, plus two reserves. So while you know there are going to be 10 or 12 people who miss out, you also know it's taken 28 people to get the squad to where they are now, and collectively all the hard work and training have made that happen.
The good thing about the squad is that any of the 28 people could go out there and do as good a job as the next person, but that also makes it harder for those who miss out. Unfortunately it's the harsh reality of sport that not everyone can make it. It's just about picking the best combination of players that are going to do the best job at the Olympics.
I've been thinking about what happens after the Games for a while. The thought hasn't consumed me, but it has been on my mind. I am only 29 and I don't feel like it's time to stop playing, but I also don't know exactly how that is going to work. I would love to continue through to the 2014 Commonwealth Games and even to try to play on for the next Olympics in Rio, but it would just depend on how the hockey programme is going to work and my job options, either in Scotland or England.
I also need to think about my family and their needs. But I'm not ready to retire, I know that for sure.
My partner works as a hockey coach at the High School of Dundee (he actually took over my job when I was selected for the GB squad) and the school has just built two new hockey pitches for the students. If I did end up coming back to Scotland it would be great if another post opened and we could both work together on a mixed programme, because at the moment it's mainly only girls that play. It's just an idea, but it is definitely something we would both like to do.
It's not easy to get jobs in hockey, certainly ones that allow you to pay your bills, but we are always trying to think of ideas. Perhaps an option is to open some kind of hockey academy. But everything is up in the air right now and I don't want to think too far ahead.
o Investec, the specialist bank and asset manager, supports women's hockey from grass-roots level through to the Great Britain national team. For more information and tickets to the Investec London Cup visit www.investec.co.uk or www.englandhockey.co.uk
