As the self-styled Leicester Lip, who once branded Australia's Justin Harrison The Plank, and was scathing about Andy Robinson on the 2005 Lions tour, Austin Healey has always been a vehicle by name and a motormouth by nature.
Yet, despite his years immersed in English rugby – he represented his country 51 times – the redoubtable little scrum-half-turned-ESPN pundit admits that he is as much in the dark as anybody else about how his compatriots will fare when they tackle Scotland at Murrayfield tomorrow.
On a positive note, Healey thinks Stuart Lancaster's new-look XV – includes the uncapped trio of Phil Dowson, Brad Barritt and Owen Farrell, and a new captain, Chris Robshaw, who has made just one England appearance – will be unburdened by expectations, given they are still rebuilding from the shambles of their World Cup campaign. A "fiasco" which, lest we forget, took the English further in the competition than the Scots.
None the less, Healey was atypically downbeat in several respects. "It's hard to gauge how they will do. England could finish second or come last in this year's competition, depending on how they perform against the Scots," said the 38-year-old star of such programmes as Strictly Come Dancing. "I watched them train on Tuesday and I was pretty enthused by what I saw, where I had previously been sceptical about their chances. But there are so many new faces that it is difficult to predict how quickly they will gel, so this could be the start of something great or they could fail miserably.
"It is obviously a new situation for Scotland to be favourites and that brings its own pressures, because I honestly don't believe people are expecting too much from the English, so they can go out and express themselves and they have plenty of attacking players, while the inclusion of so many Saracens lads [five in the starting XV] reflects how well they have done in the Aviva Premiership. But this is a hugely important contest. If England win and carry the momentum on to the next game against Italy, it could set them up nicely. But if they lose, it could be really tough going to Rome."
As a long-term analyst of oval-ball action in his homeland, Healey sympathises with the perspective of Graham Henry, the New Zealand coach, who recently addressed the issue of why the English seem to squander so much precocious talent on the ascent from age-group rugby to the Test summit.
Indeed, Healey feels that, irrespective of what transpires in the weeks ahead, serious questions need to be asked of the present structure, not merely within the RFU's environs, but across the rest of the Northern Hemisphere.
"There is something missing in the England development set-up, because we keep producing fantastic under-20 sides, and yet very few of these players progress after that stage," said Healey. "Personally, I believe that our best youngsters spend too much time in a bubble, and they are cocooned too much from the rigours of competitive rugby, because they stay within their age group, instead of being tested at a higher level, as happens in the Southern Hemisphere where teenagers are put straight into the New Zealand and Australian squads if they are good enough.
"Yes, they might have to grow up quickly, but at least they are learning what it means to play at the highest level and they can use that experience to improve their game, work on their weaknesses and, maybe above all, understand what international rugby is all about. Too many of the best youngsters among the Six Nations are shielded from that and carry on playing for the under-20s when they should be getting pushed harder, sooner. We have to tackle that problem, because it is one of the reasons why the Southern Hemisphere sides do so well."
For the moment, the Calcutta Cup is the priority, and Healey believes the Scots have a slight edge in advance of the hostilities. He dismissed Andy Robinson's criticism of perceived English arrogance as being irrelevant in the minds of Lancaster's radical selections, but admires the pace which the Scots have injected into their back line.
"Players such as the Lamonts and Max Evans carry a real threat and I've heard good things about [Lee] Jones, so England will need to start on the front foot," said Healey. "The battle between the packs will be a level playing field, while the Scottish back row doesn't seem as strong as when you had [John] Barclay, [Kelly] Brown and [Johnnie] Beattie together, but it could boil down to which team has the right attitude and wants to play positively. I don't think this will be a scrappy match – and let's hope both line-ups take the game to the other."
Healey has never been shy of expressing opinions. But even he was walking on a tightrope in his views. That sense of entering uncharted territory promises to last all the way to tomorrow evening.
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