Browsing the British Medical Journal�s Christmas issue, as the Sports Diary is wont to do over the festive period, we note that a recent study by doctors warns that titanium drivers may be hazardous to your hearing.

Browsing the British Medical Journal's Christmas issue, as the Sports Diary is wont to do over the festive period, we note that a recent study by doctors warns that titanium drivers may be hazardous to your hearing.

A 55-year-old golfer came to his doctor with mystery tinnitus, with only the noise of his King Cobra driver as possible explanation. Intrigued, the doctors conducted tests and "our results showed that thin-faced titanium drivers may produce sufficient sound to induce temporary or even permanent cochlear damage in susceptible individuals."

Doctors measured the sound made by six titanium clubs from manufacturers such as King Cobra, Callaway, Nike and Mizuno. The loudest was the Ping G10, in case you want to madden your fourball partners and risk deafness at the same time.

Scottish golfer Andrew Coltart warned about taking excessive precautions: "If you are wearing earplugs you might not hear the shouts of fore', be hit by a ball on the head and get brain damage."

Sound advice indeed.

The Sports Diary recently related the tale of the American football player who was binned by his team for changing his Facebook status to a racist message after Barack Obama's election.

Well, Oxford United youngster Sam Deering is clearly among the many, many millions of people who pay absolutely no attention to this column after becoming the latest athlete to fall foul of Web 2.0.

The midfielder broke his leg in a match on Boxing Day. While in hospital being treated, he changed his status to "Sam is not very amused in this hospital bed, so bored!" A friend responded: "Hope you have got some sexy nurses looking after you." Deering replied: "Nah, there sic f***ing P***s LOL."

Deering's 1000+ Facebook friends could all see the racist comment about his Asian nurses. Oops. He was fined by United.

CHARLES BARKLEY, the former NBA star who is no stranger to the Sports Diary because of his penchant for not paying his alarmingly large gambling debts, is in trouble again after being arrested under suspicion of driving under the influence.

His excuse to police? He was in a hurry for oral sex.

Thesmokinggun.com reprinted the police report, in all its amusing detail: "He asked me to admit that his passenger was hot'," wrote Lt Pete Smith. "He said, I was gonna drive around the corner and get a sex act'. He then explained that she had given him a sex act one week earlier and said it was the best one he had ever had in his life."

After being taken to the station, the report said Barkley offered to tattoo a police employee's name on "his ass" if he let him off the charge. How on earth they suspected he was drunk is beyond our comprehension.