AN apology. This TV review may have given the impression last week that Scotland was somehow upset with Jed Mercurio, creator of Line of Duty (BBC One, Sunday, 9pm), over the fate of oor Martin Compston, aka DS Steve Arnott, after he was seen being smacked around by a balaclava-wearing thug, thrown over a stair railing and left for dead. Harsh words like “war” and “declared” were used.
We would now like to make clear, having watched the next episode and seen the laddie sitting up in a hospital bed, a bit groggy, not wearing his trademark waistcoat but otherwise alive and well, that Scotland never had any doubts about Mr Mercurio’s sanity, probity or any other -ity. We would further like to add that last Sunday’s episode, in which DCI Roz Huntley (Thandie Newton) turned the tables on her interrogators and kicked seven shades of sexism out of charming dinosaur Ted Hastings (Adrian Dunbar), was an absolute belter. For the tape, SI Hastings turns an awfully bright shade of pink when he is mad as hell, making him look like a six-foot flamingo with epaulettes.
For my licence fee money, there just aren’t enough programmes in which famous rich people are given the chance to go on fabulous jaunts and get paid for it (sarky, moi?). It was a pleasure, therefore, to welcome two new shows to the schedules. Brian Cox’s Russia (BBC Two, Tuesday, 9pm) could equally have been named Scotland’s Russia, so keen was the Dundee-born, New York-dwelling actor to point out the many strong links between the two countries. Did you know, for example, that Tsar Nicholas II was the first colonel-in-chief of what became the Royal Scots Dragoon Guard? Or that the Grand Kremlin Palace has a St Andrew Hall, complete with mouldings depicting the saint? “It’s quite funny,” chuckled Cox, pointing upwards to the plaques showing Scotland’s patron saint. “He’s wearing what can only be best described as a pair of wee white jockeys. Good old St Andrew.” Cox, man, show some respect.
The star of Bourne and Braveheart turned out to be an amiable, knowledgeable guide, having first gone to Russia 30 years ago to teach Shakespeare. The programme could have done with a little more of his experiences (his reunion with former students was a giggle), and a little less of the Ladybird guide to Russia stuff, but I’ll be rejoining him again next week when he rocks up in St Petersburg.
Joanna Lumley’s Postcards (STV, Thursday, 8.30pm) was a rehash of her travelogues, with the Ab Fab and New Avengers star back at home, linking the clips and adding extra background spice to the tales. Lumley is truly scrumptious company: funny, daffy, but whip smart as well, and she was simply born, dahling, to wear floaty outfits while wafting around parts of the world which once formed part of the British Empire.
The first of what will be six episodes recalled her trip down the Nile in 2009 and an encounter with a camel called Charlie Brown, who understandably took to nuzzling her neck within seconds of being introduced. We also saw a cloaked Lumley sitting “stark naked, buck naked” over a hole with a pile of burning wood underneath. The process, for women only, was supposed to beautify something or other. Work it out for yourselves. Well, Judith Chalmers never did that on holiday …
Broadchurch (STV, Monday, 9pm) shut up shop this week with shocking revelations right to the end. This third and last series was a triumphant return to form, taking the gruesome business of rape and how victims are treated by the criminal justice system and tackling both subjects with sensitivity and compassion. Broadchurch did not break the modern TV crime drama mould, the Scandinavians got there first with their moody tales, but the show gave the genre a much-needed injection of British understatement, stoicism and bleak humour, raising the bar for everything that dared to follow. Hardy and Miller, David Tennant and Olivia Colman, we will miss you.
Equally sad to see the back of Homeland (Channel 4, Sunday, 9pm), another series that was back on terrific form after a few wobbles. With its themes of fake news, intelligence services under scrutiny and the election of a deeply divisive president (a woman, if you can believe it), this season was so on the money and of the moment one wondered if it had been written by clairvoyants. It ended on the bleakest note ever for Homeland, with Carrie (Claire Danes) looking towards the White House in the distance, her face a mask of fear and concern as she wondered where her country and the world was headed next. We’re right there with you Carrie, shoulder to shoulder. Hurry back.
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